People would love you and support you when its beneficial. How it happens we never notice. You forge a friendship. You do everything together. You are both doing well, its all okay as long as your success doesnt make the other person feel uncomfortable but we all forget life aint no bed of roses. And snap! It happens. This other person is moving way too fast. You find urself being afraid of what he or she might do next. Its suddenly not fun and games anymore. You are tired of clapping on the sidelines while the other one takes over everything they pass through. Thats when you begin to find faults. Things that u knew and used to be okay with suddenly becomes overbearing. You suddenly cant take it anymore. There is too much tension and pressure. You begin to drift. The other person might not even know whats going on in your head. But its there, happening. You are trying ur best to stifle it. But it aint going away.
Moral of the story? Successful people are not friendship people. They scare the shit out of everybody that gets close to them. Its just basic human instinct to see success as a threat. Only great minds think alike. On this path of success, i dont fool myself into thinking anyone is there for me, or is happy for me. Happy to see me shine. No basic human is wired to be that way. Instead of decieving myself that i am loved or relying on some reasurrance from any forged friendships or relationships, i move along. That fire on the inside is what keeps me going. The things i meditate upon are what the Word of God has to say concerning me. Vanity upon Vanity all is Vanity. All things shall pass away in the end.
There is nothing about a successful person that is loveable. So everyone should keep their fake love to themselves cuz in the end they cant even stand the test of time. Think about it, you have everything in this world that everybody else dreams of. And u expect them to be happy with you? Lies! There is no point to it. Be good to people, but never forget. Everyone is comfortable with mediocrity, someone who they can patronise, someone who is always at their mercy. There is nothing about you that agrees with that. Its always only about a matter of time. Always.
Thursday, December 11, 2014
Sunday, February 23, 2014
GOLD-DIGGER OR NA?
Hello dear readers, how was your week? I'm here again to share with you a piece of my mind. This is an issue that we all face on a daily basis. Gold digger or na?
Every girl with good upbringing can testify to a time when depending on a guy was a taboo! That time when even when offered, we refuse gift items, money and so on from men cuz somehow, it just didn't feel right and our parent thought us not to collect things from strangers. Time went on and we got into the dating game and we extended this principle into our little relationships. Declaring passionately how "love" is not dependent on the material things and how a guy doesn't have to spend on you and how you don't want his money and some other load of, excuse my language BULLSHIT. Yes. You must certainly marvel at my choice of words but let's take a little tour.
Fast-foward to 2-4 heartbreaks later (four if you're extremely slow and stupid) and we are here in our 20's and all talk about love is out. Money talks and bullshit takes the bus. All we on about is respect, security, social status and so on. Along with that comes the self righteous comments of some individuals about how we are materialistic and how "money isn't everything". But let's think about it? What really is important in this dating and relationship matter?
I personally think that at a certain stage most females especially in this society of ours is bound to have that "paul-on-the-way-to-damascus" moment. Yes that time when the fish scale drops from your eyes and you realize you've been a victim all your life. Now I don't support greed, neither do I support materialism. What I do support is giving yourself some value as a woman. Women should never think a man that has never spent a kobo on her would ever see value in her. Now don't get me wrong, there are a whole lot of other ways a man could value a woman but money plays a part in all of these. So am I a gold-digger cuz I want to give myself a little value? Absolutely not! One thing you gotta know, you set a standard on the way your man treats you by how much you make him spend on you from the onset and men see it as an investment. The bigger the stakes, the more they will strive to keep that investment. The stakes are yours to determine. So before you do anything, think twice before reaching for your wallet every now and then or nodding your head to every bullcrap story they throw at you. I keep telling girls, the ball is in your court.
Have you ever just looked around and wondered why different girls are treated differently by the same man. How he would shake at the request of one and just pretend like noone is talking for the other one? Yeah? Now our society of course has given different tags to such behaviour such as the girl having his "mumu-button" or used "jazz" or "cooked vegetable soup" and other expressions like that. But it's just a matter of smart and smarter. And there's one thing about men, it's how you let them see you that they would treat you and it's how you permit them to treat you from the onset is the same way it's gonna go through out your time together. That is what causes problems in long term relationships. I see some girls that were forming started from the bottom with their guys, month after month, year after year and then they look around them and see demands their girlfriends make of guys they just met 2hrs ago and how it works like magic and then try to mimick the same to their old guy and he looks at them like they speaking Greek lol. He literarily has the Kevin hart "waiting" face on and the girl wonders what she did wrong. You my friend did EVERYTHING wrong. You decided to settle for less and less is what you're gonna be stuck with. It's different though, if the guy does all he can within his financial boundaries to assist. So it's allowed to build up with your man though there is a 90percent risk factor that he's gonna find you a little bit too low maintenance for his taste when he finally starts making big bucks and go for a more "sophisticated" lady. (i'd explain later)
You know, I used to wonder abt wealthy guys and married men who prefer a woman who is more financially demanding. I try to decipher how you would rather waste money on this girl who wipes out your credit card and in turn hurt the one that costs less to maintain and even leave her. Like, economically speaking, the one who costs less is more beneficial. What I did not realize then is that men love the challenge. The feeling of being needed, being a provider! It is their nature and they have primal need to be needed (now you understand the risk factor).
All my ladies, before you pull off the "miss independent" "I-don't -need -your -money", "do-it -yourself "attitude,(which by the way is good to have but best shoved up your ass when thinking long-term relationship) fast-foward to 1year into the future and think about it. Are you ready to be the underdog among other girls that are not even as awesome as you are? Or would you suck it in and get it right from the start? And mind you any guy that is always reluctant to help you financially doesn't intend on keeping you around for long trust me. He sees no use making any investment on you. So run. And for those of you that have men itching to spend on you and you are busy giving talk to the hand smiley or feeling pity or guilt as to how much of his money you're spending, my sister, snap out of it! Pity them not! Let them feel your presence and feel that dent in their ocean of money caused solely by you so they can think twice before throwing it all away. Trust me no one would want to invest so much and get no returns. The bigger the investment, the bigger the returns.
With all these being said I believe I have concrete points as to financial security being an important part of relationships, for those who wish to indulge of cuz, without being guilty of the gold-digger syndrome. I ain't no goldigger ain't just messing with no broke nigga that's gonna "f**k me over" in the end. You chose, GOLD-DIGGER or na?
Thanks for reading! Do send in your comments keep them flowing, guys wouldn't you agree and girls, you feeling me? Lol. You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Every girl with good upbringing can testify to a time when depending on a guy was a taboo! That time when even when offered, we refuse gift items, money and so on from men cuz somehow, it just didn't feel right and our parent thought us not to collect things from strangers. Time went on and we got into the dating game and we extended this principle into our little relationships. Declaring passionately how "love" is not dependent on the material things and how a guy doesn't have to spend on you and how you don't want his money and some other load of, excuse my language BULLSHIT. Yes. You must certainly marvel at my choice of words but let's take a little tour.
Fast-foward to 2-4 heartbreaks later (four if you're extremely slow and stupid) and we are here in our 20's and all talk about love is out. Money talks and bullshit takes the bus. All we on about is respect, security, social status and so on. Along with that comes the self righteous comments of some individuals about how we are materialistic and how "money isn't everything". But let's think about it? What really is important in this dating and relationship matter?
I personally think that at a certain stage most females especially in this society of ours is bound to have that "paul-on-the-way-to-damascus" moment. Yes that time when the fish scale drops from your eyes and you realize you've been a victim all your life. Now I don't support greed, neither do I support materialism. What I do support is giving yourself some value as a woman. Women should never think a man that has never spent a kobo on her would ever see value in her. Now don't get me wrong, there are a whole lot of other ways a man could value a woman but money plays a part in all of these. So am I a gold-digger cuz I want to give myself a little value? Absolutely not! One thing you gotta know, you set a standard on the way your man treats you by how much you make him spend on you from the onset and men see it as an investment. The bigger the stakes, the more they will strive to keep that investment. The stakes are yours to determine. So before you do anything, think twice before reaching for your wallet every now and then or nodding your head to every bullcrap story they throw at you. I keep telling girls, the ball is in your court.
Have you ever just looked around and wondered why different girls are treated differently by the same man. How he would shake at the request of one and just pretend like noone is talking for the other one? Yeah? Now our society of course has given different tags to such behaviour such as the girl having his "mumu-button" or used "jazz" or "cooked vegetable soup" and other expressions like that. But it's just a matter of smart and smarter. And there's one thing about men, it's how you let them see you that they would treat you and it's how you permit them to treat you from the onset is the same way it's gonna go through out your time together. That is what causes problems in long term relationships. I see some girls that were forming started from the bottom with their guys, month after month, year after year and then they look around them and see demands their girlfriends make of guys they just met 2hrs ago and how it works like magic and then try to mimick the same to their old guy and he looks at them like they speaking Greek lol. He literarily has the Kevin hart "waiting" face on and the girl wonders what she did wrong. You my friend did EVERYTHING wrong. You decided to settle for less and less is what you're gonna be stuck with. It's different though, if the guy does all he can within his financial boundaries to assist. So it's allowed to build up with your man though there is a 90percent risk factor that he's gonna find you a little bit too low maintenance for his taste when he finally starts making big bucks and go for a more "sophisticated" lady. (i'd explain later)
You know, I used to wonder abt wealthy guys and married men who prefer a woman who is more financially demanding. I try to decipher how you would rather waste money on this girl who wipes out your credit card and in turn hurt the one that costs less to maintain and even leave her. Like, economically speaking, the one who costs less is more beneficial. What I did not realize then is that men love the challenge. The feeling of being needed, being a provider! It is their nature and they have primal need to be needed (now you understand the risk factor).
All my ladies, before you pull off the "miss independent" "I-don't -need -your -money", "do-it -yourself "attitude,(which by the way is good to have but best shoved up your ass when thinking long-term relationship) fast-foward to 1year into the future and think about it. Are you ready to be the underdog among other girls that are not even as awesome as you are? Or would you suck it in and get it right from the start? And mind you any guy that is always reluctant to help you financially doesn't intend on keeping you around for long trust me. He sees no use making any investment on you. So run. And for those of you that have men itching to spend on you and you are busy giving talk to the hand smiley or feeling pity or guilt as to how much of his money you're spending, my sister, snap out of it! Pity them not! Let them feel your presence and feel that dent in their ocean of money caused solely by you so they can think twice before throwing it all away. Trust me no one would want to invest so much and get no returns. The bigger the investment, the bigger the returns.
With all these being said I believe I have concrete points as to financial security being an important part of relationships, for those who wish to indulge of cuz, without being guilty of the gold-digger syndrome. I ain't no goldigger ain't just messing with no broke nigga that's gonna "f**k me over" in the end. You chose, GOLD-DIGGER or na?
Thanks for reading! Do send in your comments keep them flowing, guys wouldn't you agree and girls, you feeling me? Lol. You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Saturday, February 15, 2014
FACTS ALL FEMALES SHOULD KNOW
Hello guys how are y'all doing? How was your valentine? Lol. To all the roasters and non-roasters I love you all. Okay so my last two posts titled oliver twist was centred on attacking the men and all the guys felt cheated saying that there are two sides to the problem. The girls were so happy and excited like "oh yeah" "this is so true" and what not. Sorry to break it to you my sisters, the problem starts from you guys most of the time. Now this post isn't centred on your relation to why men cheat even though they are all intertwined. But I just want to give you all a few guidelines you should follow that would most likely help you in relationship issues and relating to your fellow girls.
1. There is absolutely nothing special about you!!
Yes I said it. I know most of you must be taken aback by this. But yeah duh! Girls feel unnecessarily special when a guy walks up to them or tweets at them or shows them a little attention. You begin to feel like beyonce. My sister open your eyes! You and all the other girls are the same until you've proven yourself different at least in the eye of the guy. U av two breasts, so does the other girls, you have thighs, u have 2 buTt cheeks, you have one head every girl does! And you wanna know something, that's all that guy sees at first. So imagine how there are many of one thing and yet you feel special about it. Not very wise don't you think? The fact that one guy that is bored or wants to just catch cruise walks up to u doesn't mean you are the only one. Your value as a girl isn't measured by that. These niggas are just trying their luck. They know we like to feel special and they do just that to get into your pants. They tell you all sort of stories about how you are different, how your eyes sparkle in its own unique way, how everything about you is just right, your personality, your brains. Pssst! Do not fall for it. The question you ask them is "how did you know"? It's true. They are not close to you and they come from nowhere trying to make you feel like your some Goddess when all u have is one overused braz, a balance of 5k in your account, and a pair of fake louboutin shoes. Don't be fooled. You got a looooong way to go girl.
2. Your beauty is the least of your assets. If you are that girl that keeps dwelling on how "fine" you are, then I'm sorry for you. My dear girls, do not carry your beauty on your head. Ok so you are fine, you are gorgeous, what now happen? Sisters, there would always be a finer girl, there would always be a skinnier, fairer, curvier girl so hold it. Infact, at this time and age, everyone is beautiful! What with the fake hair, bleaching creams, instagram filters, contoured make up and so on. Stay there now, don't let anybody hear word you hear? Na you fine pass. You will just look around you and find out that one girl you once called "ugly and ratchet" is now even finer than you after a visit to mama Tega's shop. What are you gonna do then? The idea is, if everyone can have it, then it's not special anymore. Even the Bible always advised us as women to always work on being beautiful on the inside. A woman that has grace, virtue, brains, ambition, a woman with goals is the priceless jewel. Not you the local champion.
3. There is nothing special about the community p***y you are sharing.
Girls be like "ah! He is stuck there, my p***y so good" " YEpa! I gave him snake in the monkey shadow style in the bedroom." My sister, get over your genitals, you are on a jonzing p. The only thing special about your p***y is the woman behind it. So if you're the type thinking that is enough to hold down a man I think I should give you a moment of silence. A guy simply sees it as a means to an end. Those of you that will go and sit down in a guy's house, be cheapening yourselves, rolling weed with him and his friends, playing video games, cleaning, cooking. None of that would eventually get you married. Men marry women they can trust. Women that have security, virtue and have a passion and ambition are the women that get wifed. So if you like let pant be wearing you.
4. Stop Making investments where there are no returns. Girls are experts at wasting their times. Girls can kill themselves over a guy that doesn't even take them seriously. I said it before and I'm saying it again. In solving most of the problems facing our kind today, we have to start by putting and end to the "attention-whore" disease. Girls are so desperate for attention these days that they allow themselves to be heartbroken unnecessarily. Girls break their own hearts 90percent of the time. Because a guy says hi to you or calls you doesn't mean you are his girlfriend. Always make sure you make your relationship with a guy defined before you start going overboard. Buying him vals gift, cooking for him, sleeping with him and so on. No guy would say no to a free chef and maid. Before you start offering your services, make sure you know what your getting yourselves into. The guy might even have someone already! He won't tell you obviously because he's enjoying the freebies he's getting from you. I see many girls around today and I just shake my head. Already giving themselves invisible boyfriend and really getting excited when the guy hasn't even done anything for them. They now begin to cry when they get dumped and the guy is the devil. If you weren't so stupid you won't be heartbroken.
5. You have the power. Despite the way the world would have us see it, we need to recognize that the ball is in our court. And we have the power to decide the course of our lives. We have the power to mould our man. We run the world. The downfall of many great men in history has been by women. Samson, Hitler, Abacha. Why did you think God created woman? There was something missing in the man's life, in the whole world. We are that extra touch, that spice. We are important, God made us not to be trophies or arm candies but to be helpers to the men. Work on yourself. Think longterm and not short term in everything you do. Always remember that patience is a virtue and see how that works out for you. Get rid of that "victim" mentality. We are not the weaker sex. We are stronger and we hold the reins.
It would also help for y'all to know:
6. There is no such thing as a perfect man.
7. A relationship with God is something you would eventually realise is an essential part of being a woman. Better start sooner than later.
8. Hating on other girls is even a worse waste of time than spending time with a guy that won't marry you. Stop being a fugly b**ch.
9. Whatever you do, wherever you find yourself, make yourself useful, learn a trade, acquire a skill! Don't just stand there waiting for a man to pay your bills.
10. Stop lying about your virginity and sexual history :'( nobody gives a shit! And you owe noone any explanation, not even your future husband. You are the owner of your body.
I hope I've been able to reach out to girls out there. Men, show your sisters this post, guys, your girlfriends should see this. Okay I'm going to stop here for today. You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
1. There is absolutely nothing special about you!!
Yes I said it. I know most of you must be taken aback by this. But yeah duh! Girls feel unnecessarily special when a guy walks up to them or tweets at them or shows them a little attention. You begin to feel like beyonce. My sister open your eyes! You and all the other girls are the same until you've proven yourself different at least in the eye of the guy. U av two breasts, so does the other girls, you have thighs, u have 2 buTt cheeks, you have one head every girl does! And you wanna know something, that's all that guy sees at first. So imagine how there are many of one thing and yet you feel special about it. Not very wise don't you think? The fact that one guy that is bored or wants to just catch cruise walks up to u doesn't mean you are the only one. Your value as a girl isn't measured by that. These niggas are just trying their luck. They know we like to feel special and they do just that to get into your pants. They tell you all sort of stories about how you are different, how your eyes sparkle in its own unique way, how everything about you is just right, your personality, your brains. Pssst! Do not fall for it. The question you ask them is "how did you know"? It's true. They are not close to you and they come from nowhere trying to make you feel like your some Goddess when all u have is one overused braz, a balance of 5k in your account, and a pair of fake louboutin shoes. Don't be fooled. You got a looooong way to go girl.
2. Your beauty is the least of your assets. If you are that girl that keeps dwelling on how "fine" you are, then I'm sorry for you. My dear girls, do not carry your beauty on your head. Ok so you are fine, you are gorgeous, what now happen? Sisters, there would always be a finer girl, there would always be a skinnier, fairer, curvier girl so hold it. Infact, at this time and age, everyone is beautiful! What with the fake hair, bleaching creams, instagram filters, contoured make up and so on. Stay there now, don't let anybody hear word you hear? Na you fine pass. You will just look around you and find out that one girl you once called "ugly and ratchet" is now even finer than you after a visit to mama Tega's shop. What are you gonna do then? The idea is, if everyone can have it, then it's not special anymore. Even the Bible always advised us as women to always work on being beautiful on the inside. A woman that has grace, virtue, brains, ambition, a woman with goals is the priceless jewel. Not you the local champion.
3. There is nothing special about the community p***y you are sharing.
Girls be like "ah! He is stuck there, my p***y so good" " YEpa! I gave him snake in the monkey shadow style in the bedroom." My sister, get over your genitals, you are on a jonzing p. The only thing special about your p***y is the woman behind it. So if you're the type thinking that is enough to hold down a man I think I should give you a moment of silence. A guy simply sees it as a means to an end. Those of you that will go and sit down in a guy's house, be cheapening yourselves, rolling weed with him and his friends, playing video games, cleaning, cooking. None of that would eventually get you married. Men marry women they can trust. Women that have security, virtue and have a passion and ambition are the women that get wifed. So if you like let pant be wearing you.
4. Stop Making investments where there are no returns. Girls are experts at wasting their times. Girls can kill themselves over a guy that doesn't even take them seriously. I said it before and I'm saying it again. In solving most of the problems facing our kind today, we have to start by putting and end to the "attention-whore" disease. Girls are so desperate for attention these days that they allow themselves to be heartbroken unnecessarily. Girls break their own hearts 90percent of the time. Because a guy says hi to you or calls you doesn't mean you are his girlfriend. Always make sure you make your relationship with a guy defined before you start going overboard. Buying him vals gift, cooking for him, sleeping with him and so on. No guy would say no to a free chef and maid. Before you start offering your services, make sure you know what your getting yourselves into. The guy might even have someone already! He won't tell you obviously because he's enjoying the freebies he's getting from you. I see many girls around today and I just shake my head. Already giving themselves invisible boyfriend and really getting excited when the guy hasn't even done anything for them. They now begin to cry when they get dumped and the guy is the devil. If you weren't so stupid you won't be heartbroken.
5. You have the power. Despite the way the world would have us see it, we need to recognize that the ball is in our court. And we have the power to decide the course of our lives. We have the power to mould our man. We run the world. The downfall of many great men in history has been by women. Samson, Hitler, Abacha. Why did you think God created woman? There was something missing in the man's life, in the whole world. We are that extra touch, that spice. We are important, God made us not to be trophies or arm candies but to be helpers to the men. Work on yourself. Think longterm and not short term in everything you do. Always remember that patience is a virtue and see how that works out for you. Get rid of that "victim" mentality. We are not the weaker sex. We are stronger and we hold the reins.
It would also help for y'all to know:
6. There is no such thing as a perfect man.
7. A relationship with God is something you would eventually realise is an essential part of being a woman. Better start sooner than later.
8. Hating on other girls is even a worse waste of time than spending time with a guy that won't marry you. Stop being a fugly b**ch.
9. Whatever you do, wherever you find yourself, make yourself useful, learn a trade, acquire a skill! Don't just stand there waiting for a man to pay your bills.
10. Stop lying about your virginity and sexual history :'( nobody gives a shit! And you owe noone any explanation, not even your future husband. You are the owner of your body.
I hope I've been able to reach out to girls out there. Men, show your sisters this post, guys, your girlfriends should see this. Okay I'm going to stop here for today. You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Saturday, February 8, 2014
UGLY
Now I can bet that we all have that someone in our lives who is always complaining and picking out flaws in EVERYTHING and everyone. Everyone is like "Omg she's so pretty" "Omg what a cute couple" "Omg I love her dress" and they just there like "she has a funny head" "nah its just the make up" "she ain't all that" "I'm sure they are not even faithful to eachother" "she has a birthmark on her ear" "she has a flat ass" nah that's the fake Louis vuitton he's wearing". Sound familiar? Yeah? I thought so. Those are the people you should stay far away from. They will drain all the joy in your life and turn you into sad bitter souls like themselves. These are the "professional haters". It's like they were created and designed to hate and are very good at it.
If you look deeply, you find out there is a hole somewhere in their life. An emptiness they need to fill up. An insufficiency, insecurity somewhere. They can't seem to fill it up, and they look for it in others. That imperfection that is leaving their lives void is exactly what they criticise in others. People have to learn to stop this bad behaviour! It doesn't speak well. Infact, when I find myself around people that keep ranting about what's wrong with everybody and the world and what not, I feel a lot of pity for them cuz I actually find it pathetic. I feel like giving them a pat on the back and ask them "what happened to you?" "who hurt you?" "it's gonna be okay" LOL. Honestly, we should all learn to embrace the fact that no human is perfect and ranting about someone else's "imperfection" , which by the way has been fully embraced by that individual, isn't going to change anything. The person is moving on with his or her life and you are just sitting there.. stuck on stupid. How sad.
The picture mentioned how it's the ugly girls who call people ugly the most. My dear ones from my personal experiences mehn, I concur oh. You all should just observe around you. That wide mouthed person that criticises people's looks is the least goodlooking person in the room most of the time. That wide mouthed dude that keeps emphasising on how some people are broke niggas is usually the brokest and that person that is criticising relationships and has the load down on all the couple's Jist, who's cheating with who and so on, hilariously is usually the single, lonely one. It's really funny.
My fellow Nigerians, you need to renew your minds. If you fall into this category of people please CHANGE. Your life would remain stagnant if you keep dwelling on the things that are missing in your life, looking for them in others. Those of you that have people like this around you, stay far away from them don't let them infect you oh.
Okay, imma stop here for now. Thanks for reading ;) You know I'm awesome xoxo
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
OLIVER TWIST
Hello dear readers, I know you all have missed me so much. I promise to write more often. I'm even writing exams right now but I just couldn't help but lift this off my mind. You see the topic up there? Sounds interesting right? The real topic should have been "NIGGA WHAT's WROOOONG WITCHU?". I'm seriously tired of men these days and their funny ways.
Recently, a few of my close friends have come forward with the same complaint.. unfaithful men. Now I know this so cliché. It's the order of the day. It's not a new thing. But as a deep thinker, I get really pissed when I try to decipher the rationale behind this animalistic behaviour that has eaten into our society. Where are all the good men? Is there any such thing as a faithful man? If he exists, BIKO where is he?
I'm using Nigeria as a case study today. I know this is a common occurrence everywhere in the world and has been going on long before I was born but really it is getting out of hand. Every young trendy and exposed girl can testify to a married man asking them out. Relationships are being broken everyday because of cheating partners. Now we are all humans, everybody makes mistakes but making it become a normal thing is what is annoying me.
Dear men, what is your problem? I'm really curious as to why yo just can't keep a good girl and be faithful to just that one girl. Why must you have a side chick? If u love so many beautiful women all at once why don't you remain single? Why subject an innocent lady to heartbreak and unnecessary stress? Is it by force? You see them everywhere. The married ones do not even care to hide their rings. Many of them already have women they have impregnated, paid bride price for, yet you see them chasing young pretty girls all around town. It just doesnt make sense to me. Is it the polygamst nature of African men thats the issue? Because these men include activists, public motivational speakers and even pastors. People that are supposed to be role models. They cant even be faithful to their partners. Is it the corrupt nature of Nigerians? The whole "corrupt leaders" issue we have in this country comes from the grassroots. The smallest child is already a corrupt Nigerian because he emulates his parents. Dishonesty is the order of the day. People are becoming more selfish, lustful and cruel by the day. That is why people are advised to love their partners. I as a person do not see the need to cheat on someone i love. The impulse doesnt just come to go and look for someone else. The question i ask myself is "what am i looking for"? If the woman of your dreams has a particular list of features, why not look for her and marry her? Why do you have to settle for less and start wasting your precious time and money on other women? You instead prefer to pick the unattractive, village girl and get her pregnant and leave her oppressed in your house and do whatever you like, destroying the lives of other men's future wives. The most annoying are these young boy that can barely fend for themselves, maltreating the girls that manage to give them attention and love. You go through the trouble to chase a particular girl, when you get her finally, you are still not satisfied and you are chasing after others. The poor girl is feeling like your one and only not knowing she has become a laughing stock because of you. Why the lies? Why do you have to use the mask of relationship to get into girl's pants? I believe the whole energy and time these men put into plotting and scheming can be used to do something more productive. The devil is obviously toying with the destinies of most men in this country.
We the girls have some of the blame also. The way you present yourself to a man is very important. There are many things we need to understand as girls. Maybe that would be my next post. Refuse to be taken for a fool. Refuse to fall for the same line over and over again. A man would do anything to get a woman he has set his eyes on so you girls can start by not being such attention whores and stop being freaked by what guys do to get down with you. Im hardly impressed by guys to be honest. I would rather sit back and watch them run in circles till they are exhausted.
Men should really stop this behaviour. And you can also drop in comments and reasons why men do what they do because honestly, im just lost. It is way too deep. Where can we find a good man? What went wrong?
Would stop here for now. You know i'm awesome, xoxo.
Recently, a few of my close friends have come forward with the same complaint.. unfaithful men. Now I know this so cliché. It's the order of the day. It's not a new thing. But as a deep thinker, I get really pissed when I try to decipher the rationale behind this animalistic behaviour that has eaten into our society. Where are all the good men? Is there any such thing as a faithful man? If he exists, BIKO where is he?
I'm using Nigeria as a case study today. I know this is a common occurrence everywhere in the world and has been going on long before I was born but really it is getting out of hand. Every young trendy and exposed girl can testify to a married man asking them out. Relationships are being broken everyday because of cheating partners. Now we are all humans, everybody makes mistakes but making it become a normal thing is what is annoying me.
Dear men, what is your problem? I'm really curious as to why yo just can't keep a good girl and be faithful to just that one girl. Why must you have a side chick? If u love so many beautiful women all at once why don't you remain single? Why subject an innocent lady to heartbreak and unnecessary stress? Is it by force? You see them everywhere. The married ones do not even care to hide their rings. Many of them already have women they have impregnated, paid bride price for, yet you see them chasing young pretty girls all around town. It just doesnt make sense to me. Is it the polygamst nature of African men thats the issue? Because these men include activists, public motivational speakers and even pastors. People that are supposed to be role models. They cant even be faithful to their partners. Is it the corrupt nature of Nigerians? The whole "corrupt leaders" issue we have in this country comes from the grassroots. The smallest child is already a corrupt Nigerian because he emulates his parents. Dishonesty is the order of the day. People are becoming more selfish, lustful and cruel by the day. That is why people are advised to love their partners. I as a person do not see the need to cheat on someone i love. The impulse doesnt just come to go and look for someone else. The question i ask myself is "what am i looking for"? If the woman of your dreams has a particular list of features, why not look for her and marry her? Why do you have to settle for less and start wasting your precious time and money on other women? You instead prefer to pick the unattractive, village girl and get her pregnant and leave her oppressed in your house and do whatever you like, destroying the lives of other men's future wives. The most annoying are these young boy that can barely fend for themselves, maltreating the girls that manage to give them attention and love. You go through the trouble to chase a particular girl, when you get her finally, you are still not satisfied and you are chasing after others. The poor girl is feeling like your one and only not knowing she has become a laughing stock because of you. Why the lies? Why do you have to use the mask of relationship to get into girl's pants? I believe the whole energy and time these men put into plotting and scheming can be used to do something more productive. The devil is obviously toying with the destinies of most men in this country.
We the girls have some of the blame also. The way you present yourself to a man is very important. There are many things we need to understand as girls. Maybe that would be my next post. Refuse to be taken for a fool. Refuse to fall for the same line over and over again. A man would do anything to get a woman he has set his eyes on so you girls can start by not being such attention whores and stop being freaked by what guys do to get down with you. Im hardly impressed by guys to be honest. I would rather sit back and watch them run in circles till they are exhausted.
Men should really stop this behaviour. And you can also drop in comments and reasons why men do what they do because honestly, im just lost. It is way too deep. Where can we find a good man? What went wrong?
Would stop here for now. You know i'm awesome, xoxo.
Monday, November 4, 2013
BE AT THE TOP OF YOUR GAME
Hello dear readers! I know I haven't posted in AGES infact I doubt y'all are even interested in whatever I might have to write lool! (yeah right, you wish) I wouldn't pretend that the ongoing ASUU strike is the reason behind my suspected "writer's block" infact I don't think I'm having any writer's block. I must agree to something though, the energy around here, for me atleast has gone pretty bleak. The situation of things, pardon my language, is shitty. Maybe a change in environment would do the trick though I tried that. Anyways, long story short, we all just pushing it. God is in control. We just gotta keep a positive mindset and stay happy, which is pretty much what this post is all about. Came across this amazing write up and just had to share with you all. This post is not for Christians alone. Principles from the Bible were only extracted to emphasise the message being passed across. Enjoy...
1 Peter 3:10-12 KJV
For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile: [11] Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it. [12] For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil.
1 Peter 3:8-9 KJV
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: [9] Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
1.Quit wanting to be someone else.
Have value for yourself. Be happy about You! The first person you have is you. God values you and if he does, you should have value for yourself.
Your responsibility is to bring the best outta you. The Holy Ghost has different manifestations through us and as such we can only bring forth what we have sown into ourselves. The question is how do we sow into ourselves? You are the harvest of the seeds sown by your parents, school, friends, media etc. To make an adjustment, you need to introduce new seeds, not by praying or discussing the issue. What is le ft is to sow those seeds in to you. Become satisfied first that God wants you and has you. Receive inspiring words and stop your ears from the wrong stuff.
Matthew 15:6 KJV
And honour not his father or his mother, he shall be free . Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition.
Beleive is what God has made you. You are an expression of the seeds you have planted, the books you read, the movies you watch. They all have an impact on you. It is deceit to say they have no effect.
If a baby stays in a room all his life and does not talk to anyone, he will grow up not knowing how to talk. That's because he received no words while growing and neither heard them and as such won't know how to talk.
We have messages on the inside we wanna express. And when someone doesn't understand us, we respond with anger and frustration. Words are the most beautiful gift given to us by God. Words dheet our lives."your life goes in the direction of your words". You are a product of your words. When you hurt others with your words, you destroy the programming of good and righteousness in you.Your life turns in the wrong direction because you are programmed to bless with words.
2.Quit trying to change other people.
Don't write someone off if they have refused to change. You really can't change anybody not even with prayer.
The question is why do you want to change them? While we were yet sinners, christ died for us. He didn't wait for us to change. People don't really need to change, they are all wonderful the way they are. Paul said,"I am all things to all men" meaning he accepted them the way they were. On his way to damascus, he wanted to change others but God changed that and gave him "a message". That was the change, so others could receive salvation and a remission of sins. People wanna become what God wants them to be not what you want them to become. If you love people for who they are, they discover their value, and move in that direction of who they are in christ. Quite trying to change others because you are trying to say you are better than they are. What does God think about that? It's not right of course. Jesus is the true expression of the father, we can only give examples with ourselves of him and he thus shows us a picture. When we show a picture of Jesus for others to see(through yourself), they see themselves. That's amazing! You see a glorified you when you see a picture of the master!!! Ayaaaaa!!!!! When they see the picture, they see themselves. God's expression of Jesus, the living word is a mirror, and as we look, we see a beautiful, righteousness,glorious us and we become successful. That's the message to the whole world! Quit changing others and setting standards for others, show them Jesus, the ultimate standard and with time, there will be improvements.
1 Thessalonians 4:11 KJV
And ye study to be quiet, and to Do YOUR OWN BUSINESS, and to work with your own hands; as we have commanded you
To have an extraordinary life,
Value you
Stop trying to change others, it's more like saying they should imitate you.
3. Quit judging others
You will be amazed how wonderful people are, ignore the wrong parts,it's none of your business, lead a quiet life, dwell on the good parts. As long as you are into other people's business, you will never be happy. That will cause you to be frustrated, get off other people's lives . The more you go into other people's business, you judge them and become critical and see only the wrongs. This causes you to dislike other people you don't know. "A gossip spreads the message but a righteousness man stops it". Put a stop to the gossip about others. When you slander others, it's wrong. Don't tell stories that will make others dislike or hate another, give a good picture of others, it's your responsibility. Propagate love because you are the offspring of love, not hate.
When the prostitute who was caught fornicating was brought to Jesus and they all wanted to test him saying,"this woman broke the law of Moses,what should we do to her"?
Jesus ignored them. Jesus does what his father does, when you judge others, God ignores you! All he did was tell whoever was without sin to cast the first stone! One by one, they dropped their stones. Jesus then told the woman, where are thine prosecutors? She said no one and Jesus said he condemned her neither . Jesus was on his way to the cross to set this woman free and told her to go and sin no more, he recognised her sin and told her to go and sin no more. He took her place on the cross, defended her before God for her transgressions and bore our punishments. "Judge not so that ye may not be judged". Consider being in other people's shoes, if others don't have the knowledge you have,don't judge them cos if they knew what you knew, they wouldn't be in their predicament. Understanding the scriptures is a miracle and if God didn't help you, you wouldn't be where you are. This shows you are not necessarily better than others, it makes you thankful and more humble that the Holy Ghost could teach you. So when you see others not acting accordingly or going to church, you become thankfully that God helped you and that you are where you are. Be thankful God helped you to listen to the word or hear the Holy Ghost. People in Jesus time didn't know the truth yet they accused him of being a fraud.
Be thankful you know what you know about God, to have a feel of God and to listen to words of life. Prayer for those who don't know and can't receive the word and the understanding of the word will come to them. You don't know how they grew up or their childhood, just pray that their minds are open.
You can be a success and be at the top of your game if you do these things:
-be the best of what God has made you to be
-don't try to make others what they are not, let them be the best of what God has made them
-bridle your tongue and speak no evil of others
-mind your own business
-judge not others
Have a lovely day and month ahead.
1 Peter 3:10-12 KJV
For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile: [11] Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it. [12] For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil.
1 Peter 3:8-9 KJV
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: [9] Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
1.Quit wanting to be someone else.
Have value for yourself. Be happy about You! The first person you have is you. God values you and if he does, you should have value for yourself.
Your responsibility is to bring the best outta you. The Holy Ghost has different manifestations through us and as such we can only bring forth what we have sown into ourselves. The question is how do we sow into ourselves? You are the harvest of the seeds sown by your parents, school, friends, media etc. To make an adjustment, you need to introduce new seeds, not by praying or discussing the issue. What is le ft is to sow those seeds in to you. Become satisfied first that God wants you and has you. Receive inspiring words and stop your ears from the wrong stuff.
Matthew 15:6 KJV
And honour not his father or his mother, he shall be free . Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition.
Beleive is what God has made you. You are an expression of the seeds you have planted, the books you read, the movies you watch. They all have an impact on you. It is deceit to say they have no effect.
If a baby stays in a room all his life and does not talk to anyone, he will grow up not knowing how to talk. That's because he received no words while growing and neither heard them and as such won't know how to talk.
We have messages on the inside we wanna express. And when someone doesn't understand us, we respond with anger and frustration. Words are the most beautiful gift given to us by God. Words dheet our lives."your life goes in the direction of your words". You are a product of your words. When you hurt others with your words, you destroy the programming of good and righteousness in you.Your life turns in the wrong direction because you are programmed to bless with words.
2.Quit trying to change other people.
Don't write someone off if they have refused to change. You really can't change anybody not even with prayer.
The question is why do you want to change them? While we were yet sinners, christ died for us. He didn't wait for us to change. People don't really need to change, they are all wonderful the way they are. Paul said,"I am all things to all men" meaning he accepted them the way they were. On his way to damascus, he wanted to change others but God changed that and gave him "a message". That was the change, so others could receive salvation and a remission of sins. People wanna become what God wants them to be not what you want them to become. If you love people for who they are, they discover their value, and move in that direction of who they are in christ. Quite trying to change others because you are trying to say you are better than they are. What does God think about that? It's not right of course. Jesus is the true expression of the father, we can only give examples with ourselves of him and he thus shows us a picture. When we show a picture of Jesus for others to see(through yourself), they see themselves. That's amazing! You see a glorified you when you see a picture of the master!!! Ayaaaaa!!!!! When they see the picture, they see themselves. God's expression of Jesus, the living word is a mirror, and as we look, we see a beautiful, righteousness,glorious us and we become successful. That's the message to the whole world! Quit changing others and setting standards for others, show them Jesus, the ultimate standard and with time, there will be improvements.
1 Thessalonians 4:11 KJV
And ye study to be quiet, and to Do YOUR OWN BUSINESS, and to work with your own hands; as we have commanded you
To have an extraordinary life,
Value you
Stop trying to change others, it's more like saying they should imitate you.
3. Quit judging others
You will be amazed how wonderful people are, ignore the wrong parts,it's none of your business, lead a quiet life, dwell on the good parts. As long as you are into other people's business, you will never be happy. That will cause you to be frustrated, get off other people's lives . The more you go into other people's business, you judge them and become critical and see only the wrongs. This causes you to dislike other people you don't know. "A gossip spreads the message but a righteousness man stops it". Put a stop to the gossip about others. When you slander others, it's wrong. Don't tell stories that will make others dislike or hate another, give a good picture of others, it's your responsibility. Propagate love because you are the offspring of love, not hate.
When the prostitute who was caught fornicating was brought to Jesus and they all wanted to test him saying,"this woman broke the law of Moses,what should we do to her"?
Jesus ignored them. Jesus does what his father does, when you judge others, God ignores you! All he did was tell whoever was without sin to cast the first stone! One by one, they dropped their stones. Jesus then told the woman, where are thine prosecutors? She said no one and Jesus said he condemned her neither . Jesus was on his way to the cross to set this woman free and told her to go and sin no more, he recognised her sin and told her to go and sin no more. He took her place on the cross, defended her before God for her transgressions and bore our punishments. "Judge not so that ye may not be judged". Consider being in other people's shoes, if others don't have the knowledge you have,don't judge them cos if they knew what you knew, they wouldn't be in their predicament. Understanding the scriptures is a miracle and if God didn't help you, you wouldn't be where you are. This shows you are not necessarily better than others, it makes you thankful and more humble that the Holy Ghost could teach you. So when you see others not acting accordingly or going to church, you become thankfully that God helped you and that you are where you are. Be thankful God helped you to listen to the word or hear the Holy Ghost. People in Jesus time didn't know the truth yet they accused him of being a fraud.
Be thankful you know what you know about God, to have a feel of God and to listen to words of life. Prayer for those who don't know and can't receive the word and the understanding of the word will come to them. You don't know how they grew up or their childhood, just pray that their minds are open.
You can be a success and be at the top of your game if you do these things:
-be the best of what God has made you to be
-don't try to make others what they are not, let them be the best of what God has made them
-bridle your tongue and speak no evil of others
-mind your own business
-judge not others
Have a lovely day and month ahead.
Sunday, June 30, 2013
DO NOT SWEAT IT
"Do not let people who do so little for you control ur emotions..." This statement is resounding in my head as i lay here thinking, reflecting. So many things that have happened in the past. So many people that have walked in and out of my life within this short time I've spent on this earth. I look back at the people that used to matter.. Where are they today? This life is just filled with passing things and people. No one and nobody is permanent. I think about the people I've put my trust in and they felt I couldnt get stuff done without them. LOL. How do humans become so narrow-minded? Do i blame it on "human nature"? Or do we just allow "the Devil" to play ball with our minds and decieve us into thinking that for some reason we have arrived! And we are so mighty and powerful that we can do whatever the hell we want with our fellow humans' lives and feelings. How do we get so cold without even realizing it? The heart of man, the Bible says, is "Desperately Wicked".
I laugh as I think back and I'm very grateful to Almighty God for always showing and constantly proving what was written in His Word that He can raise up stones if humans wld choose to ignore Him. The stones can do ur work! So why feel indispensable. When you're in a position to be of help to someone or when you're responsible for someone why not take up the opportunity to be a blessing rather than be an oppressor? When in a relationship with someone why not use the opportunity to impart your best in that person and be remembered for something good than listening to the voice of your own genitals or bank account? When in the position to be a friend why not actually be a friend than seeking what you are going to gain from the alliance or seeking to bring others down instead. Why lead that girl on just cuz you know she'll do anything you say and take advantage of her? Why go into anything at all if your mind isnt in it? No one is forcing anybody! The reasons why we humans do these things is still beyond me. But we still gotta live and shake off all these obstacles and be strong. Im learning everyday to do that.
"I survived without you".. So much satisfaction in that statement! At this point i believe in three things:
1. People come and go,
2. Money comes and goes and
3. You can have whatsoever you desire if you put your mind to it and trust God. Only God.
Humans are selfish, self-centered, self- seeking. In the end nobody really gives a damn about your feelings. The earlier you come to realize that the better it is for you. What really slows people down in life is the value attach to people that are not worth it. Now im not saying you should not care for your neighbour like the Lord commanded, but you shouldnt let people make you lose focus.
The answer is simple. Do not focus your mind on things that are temporary. Do not allow anyone to walk all over you just because they sense you have a soft spot for them. People are temporary. Nothing lasts forever. The only thing that lasts forever is the Kingdom of God. Do things without expecting anything in return because expectations lead to disappointments and disappointments break hearts. If someone isnt gonna help you with something, someone else will. If he doesnt treat you right, someone else will. If she cheats on you, theres someone out there who wont. My people, get rid of the unnecessary baggage. Im not scared of losing anyone so much that they would hold me back. No sir. We all need to learn to breathe. Do something that makes you trully happy. Dont let your emotions get the best of you. They are within your control. Anyone who says they arent is lying to you. Im talking from experience when i sincerely say evrything is vanity!! Stuff you could kill for a few months ago, you look back and you're like, "seriously"?? It happens every damn time. People included! Those u couldnt go a day without talking to them some time ago, you go weeks without even a thought about them. Thatmy dear readers, is life! What you now did within the period you were in an illusion is what u're left with. And then you look back and think, "what was even my gain"? "What did he/ she even do for me"? Do not be a loser. If only we can all be patient! we would quit making the same mistakes over and over again.
Do not let people that do so little for you take over your thoughts, time, money and emotions. These things are gifts from God. Use them wisely. Live everyday like its your last. So if you die today you would know you lived YOUR life. Biko, that is not why Jesus came to die for us. He came that we should have life and have it in abundance. Not so we can fret day and night about bullshit. Make up your mind today! Do something for You! ;)
You know im awesome... Xoxo
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