People would love you and support you when its beneficial. How it happens we never notice. You forge a friendship. You do everything together. You are both doing well, its all okay as long as your success doesnt make the other person feel uncomfortable but we all forget life aint no bed of roses. And snap! It happens. This other person is moving way too fast. You find urself being afraid of what he or she might do next. Its suddenly not fun and games anymore. You are tired of clapping on the sidelines while the other one takes over everything they pass through. Thats when you begin to find faults. Things that u knew and used to be okay with suddenly becomes overbearing. You suddenly cant take it anymore. There is too much tension and pressure. You begin to drift. The other person might not even know whats going on in your head. But its there, happening. You are trying ur best to stifle it. But it aint going away.
Moral of the story? Successful people are not friendship people. They scare the shit out of everybody that gets close to them. Its just basic human instinct to see success as a threat. Only great minds think alike. On this path of success, i dont fool myself into thinking anyone is there for me, or is happy for me. Happy to see me shine. No basic human is wired to be that way. Instead of decieving myself that i am loved or relying on some reasurrance from any forged friendships or relationships, i move along. That fire on the inside is what keeps me going. The things i meditate upon are what the Word of God has to say concerning me. Vanity upon Vanity all is Vanity. All things shall pass away in the end.
There is nothing about a successful person that is loveable. So everyone should keep their fake love to themselves cuz in the end they cant even stand the test of time. Think about it, you have everything in this world that everybody else dreams of. And u expect them to be happy with you? Lies! There is no point to it. Be good to people, but never forget. Everyone is comfortable with mediocrity, someone who they can patronise, someone who is always at their mercy. There is nothing about you that agrees with that. Its always only about a matter of time. Always.
Thursday, December 11, 2014
Sunday, February 23, 2014
GOLD-DIGGER OR NA?
Hello dear readers, how was your week? I'm here again to share with you a piece of my mind. This is an issue that we all face on a daily basis. Gold digger or na?
Every girl with good upbringing can testify to a time when depending on a guy was a taboo! That time when even when offered, we refuse gift items, money and so on from men cuz somehow, it just didn't feel right and our parent thought us not to collect things from strangers. Time went on and we got into the dating game and we extended this principle into our little relationships. Declaring passionately how "love" is not dependent on the material things and how a guy doesn't have to spend on you and how you don't want his money and some other load of, excuse my language BULLSHIT. Yes. You must certainly marvel at my choice of words but let's take a little tour.
Fast-foward to 2-4 heartbreaks later (four if you're extremely slow and stupid) and we are here in our 20's and all talk about love is out. Money talks and bullshit takes the bus. All we on about is respect, security, social status and so on. Along with that comes the self righteous comments of some individuals about how we are materialistic and how "money isn't everything". But let's think about it? What really is important in this dating and relationship matter?
I personally think that at a certain stage most females especially in this society of ours is bound to have that "paul-on-the-way-to-damascus" moment. Yes that time when the fish scale drops from your eyes and you realize you've been a victim all your life. Now I don't support greed, neither do I support materialism. What I do support is giving yourself some value as a woman. Women should never think a man that has never spent a kobo on her would ever see value in her. Now don't get me wrong, there are a whole lot of other ways a man could value a woman but money plays a part in all of these. So am I a gold-digger cuz I want to give myself a little value? Absolutely not! One thing you gotta know, you set a standard on the way your man treats you by how much you make him spend on you from the onset and men see it as an investment. The bigger the stakes, the more they will strive to keep that investment. The stakes are yours to determine. So before you do anything, think twice before reaching for your wallet every now and then or nodding your head to every bullcrap story they throw at you. I keep telling girls, the ball is in your court.
Have you ever just looked around and wondered why different girls are treated differently by the same man. How he would shake at the request of one and just pretend like noone is talking for the other one? Yeah? Now our society of course has given different tags to such behaviour such as the girl having his "mumu-button" or used "jazz" or "cooked vegetable soup" and other expressions like that. But it's just a matter of smart and smarter. And there's one thing about men, it's how you let them see you that they would treat you and it's how you permit them to treat you from the onset is the same way it's gonna go through out your time together. That is what causes problems in long term relationships. I see some girls that were forming started from the bottom with their guys, month after month, year after year and then they look around them and see demands their girlfriends make of guys they just met 2hrs ago and how it works like magic and then try to mimick the same to their old guy and he looks at them like they speaking Greek lol. He literarily has the Kevin hart "waiting" face on and the girl wonders what she did wrong. You my friend did EVERYTHING wrong. You decided to settle for less and less is what you're gonna be stuck with. It's different though, if the guy does all he can within his financial boundaries to assist. So it's allowed to build up with your man though there is a 90percent risk factor that he's gonna find you a little bit too low maintenance for his taste when he finally starts making big bucks and go for a more "sophisticated" lady. (i'd explain later)
You know, I used to wonder abt wealthy guys and married men who prefer a woman who is more financially demanding. I try to decipher how you would rather waste money on this girl who wipes out your credit card and in turn hurt the one that costs less to maintain and even leave her. Like, economically speaking, the one who costs less is more beneficial. What I did not realize then is that men love the challenge. The feeling of being needed, being a provider! It is their nature and they have primal need to be needed (now you understand the risk factor).
All my ladies, before you pull off the "miss independent" "I-don't -need -your -money", "do-it -yourself "attitude,(which by the way is good to have but best shoved up your ass when thinking long-term relationship) fast-foward to 1year into the future and think about it. Are you ready to be the underdog among other girls that are not even as awesome as you are? Or would you suck it in and get it right from the start? And mind you any guy that is always reluctant to help you financially doesn't intend on keeping you around for long trust me. He sees no use making any investment on you. So run. And for those of you that have men itching to spend on you and you are busy giving talk to the hand smiley or feeling pity or guilt as to how much of his money you're spending, my sister, snap out of it! Pity them not! Let them feel your presence and feel that dent in their ocean of money caused solely by you so they can think twice before throwing it all away. Trust me no one would want to invest so much and get no returns. The bigger the investment, the bigger the returns.
With all these being said I believe I have concrete points as to financial security being an important part of relationships, for those who wish to indulge of cuz, without being guilty of the gold-digger syndrome. I ain't no goldigger ain't just messing with no broke nigga that's gonna "f**k me over" in the end. You chose, GOLD-DIGGER or na?
Thanks for reading! Do send in your comments keep them flowing, guys wouldn't you agree and girls, you feeling me? Lol. You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Every girl with good upbringing can testify to a time when depending on a guy was a taboo! That time when even when offered, we refuse gift items, money and so on from men cuz somehow, it just didn't feel right and our parent thought us not to collect things from strangers. Time went on and we got into the dating game and we extended this principle into our little relationships. Declaring passionately how "love" is not dependent on the material things and how a guy doesn't have to spend on you and how you don't want his money and some other load of, excuse my language BULLSHIT. Yes. You must certainly marvel at my choice of words but let's take a little tour.
Fast-foward to 2-4 heartbreaks later (four if you're extremely slow and stupid) and we are here in our 20's and all talk about love is out. Money talks and bullshit takes the bus. All we on about is respect, security, social status and so on. Along with that comes the self righteous comments of some individuals about how we are materialistic and how "money isn't everything". But let's think about it? What really is important in this dating and relationship matter?
I personally think that at a certain stage most females especially in this society of ours is bound to have that "paul-on-the-way-to-damascus" moment. Yes that time when the fish scale drops from your eyes and you realize you've been a victim all your life. Now I don't support greed, neither do I support materialism. What I do support is giving yourself some value as a woman. Women should never think a man that has never spent a kobo on her would ever see value in her. Now don't get me wrong, there are a whole lot of other ways a man could value a woman but money plays a part in all of these. So am I a gold-digger cuz I want to give myself a little value? Absolutely not! One thing you gotta know, you set a standard on the way your man treats you by how much you make him spend on you from the onset and men see it as an investment. The bigger the stakes, the more they will strive to keep that investment. The stakes are yours to determine. So before you do anything, think twice before reaching for your wallet every now and then or nodding your head to every bullcrap story they throw at you. I keep telling girls, the ball is in your court.
Have you ever just looked around and wondered why different girls are treated differently by the same man. How he would shake at the request of one and just pretend like noone is talking for the other one? Yeah? Now our society of course has given different tags to such behaviour such as the girl having his "mumu-button" or used "jazz" or "cooked vegetable soup" and other expressions like that. But it's just a matter of smart and smarter. And there's one thing about men, it's how you let them see you that they would treat you and it's how you permit them to treat you from the onset is the same way it's gonna go through out your time together. That is what causes problems in long term relationships. I see some girls that were forming started from the bottom with their guys, month after month, year after year and then they look around them and see demands their girlfriends make of guys they just met 2hrs ago and how it works like magic and then try to mimick the same to their old guy and he looks at them like they speaking Greek lol. He literarily has the Kevin hart "waiting" face on and the girl wonders what she did wrong. You my friend did EVERYTHING wrong. You decided to settle for less and less is what you're gonna be stuck with. It's different though, if the guy does all he can within his financial boundaries to assist. So it's allowed to build up with your man though there is a 90percent risk factor that he's gonna find you a little bit too low maintenance for his taste when he finally starts making big bucks and go for a more "sophisticated" lady. (i'd explain later)
You know, I used to wonder abt wealthy guys and married men who prefer a woman who is more financially demanding. I try to decipher how you would rather waste money on this girl who wipes out your credit card and in turn hurt the one that costs less to maintain and even leave her. Like, economically speaking, the one who costs less is more beneficial. What I did not realize then is that men love the challenge. The feeling of being needed, being a provider! It is their nature and they have primal need to be needed (now you understand the risk factor).
All my ladies, before you pull off the "miss independent" "I-don't -need -your -money", "do-it -yourself "attitude,(which by the way is good to have but best shoved up your ass when thinking long-term relationship) fast-foward to 1year into the future and think about it. Are you ready to be the underdog among other girls that are not even as awesome as you are? Or would you suck it in and get it right from the start? And mind you any guy that is always reluctant to help you financially doesn't intend on keeping you around for long trust me. He sees no use making any investment on you. So run. And for those of you that have men itching to spend on you and you are busy giving talk to the hand smiley or feeling pity or guilt as to how much of his money you're spending, my sister, snap out of it! Pity them not! Let them feel your presence and feel that dent in their ocean of money caused solely by you so they can think twice before throwing it all away. Trust me no one would want to invest so much and get no returns. The bigger the investment, the bigger the returns.
With all these being said I believe I have concrete points as to financial security being an important part of relationships, for those who wish to indulge of cuz, without being guilty of the gold-digger syndrome. I ain't no goldigger ain't just messing with no broke nigga that's gonna "f**k me over" in the end. You chose, GOLD-DIGGER or na?
Thanks for reading! Do send in your comments keep them flowing, guys wouldn't you agree and girls, you feeling me? Lol. You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Saturday, February 15, 2014
FACTS ALL FEMALES SHOULD KNOW
Hello guys how are y'all doing? How was your valentine? Lol. To all the roasters and non-roasters I love you all. Okay so my last two posts titled oliver twist was centred on attacking the men and all the guys felt cheated saying that there are two sides to the problem. The girls were so happy and excited like "oh yeah" "this is so true" and what not. Sorry to break it to you my sisters, the problem starts from you guys most of the time. Now this post isn't centred on your relation to why men cheat even though they are all intertwined. But I just want to give you all a few guidelines you should follow that would most likely help you in relationship issues and relating to your fellow girls.
1. There is absolutely nothing special about you!!
Yes I said it. I know most of you must be taken aback by this. But yeah duh! Girls feel unnecessarily special when a guy walks up to them or tweets at them or shows them a little attention. You begin to feel like beyonce. My sister open your eyes! You and all the other girls are the same until you've proven yourself different at least in the eye of the guy. U av two breasts, so does the other girls, you have thighs, u have 2 buTt cheeks, you have one head every girl does! And you wanna know something, that's all that guy sees at first. So imagine how there are many of one thing and yet you feel special about it. Not very wise don't you think? The fact that one guy that is bored or wants to just catch cruise walks up to u doesn't mean you are the only one. Your value as a girl isn't measured by that. These niggas are just trying their luck. They know we like to feel special and they do just that to get into your pants. They tell you all sort of stories about how you are different, how your eyes sparkle in its own unique way, how everything about you is just right, your personality, your brains. Pssst! Do not fall for it. The question you ask them is "how did you know"? It's true. They are not close to you and they come from nowhere trying to make you feel like your some Goddess when all u have is one overused braz, a balance of 5k in your account, and a pair of fake louboutin shoes. Don't be fooled. You got a looooong way to go girl.
2. Your beauty is the least of your assets. If you are that girl that keeps dwelling on how "fine" you are, then I'm sorry for you. My dear girls, do not carry your beauty on your head. Ok so you are fine, you are gorgeous, what now happen? Sisters, there would always be a finer girl, there would always be a skinnier, fairer, curvier girl so hold it. Infact, at this time and age, everyone is beautiful! What with the fake hair, bleaching creams, instagram filters, contoured make up and so on. Stay there now, don't let anybody hear word you hear? Na you fine pass. You will just look around you and find out that one girl you once called "ugly and ratchet" is now even finer than you after a visit to mama Tega's shop. What are you gonna do then? The idea is, if everyone can have it, then it's not special anymore. Even the Bible always advised us as women to always work on being beautiful on the inside. A woman that has grace, virtue, brains, ambition, a woman with goals is the priceless jewel. Not you the local champion.
3. There is nothing special about the community p***y you are sharing.
Girls be like "ah! He is stuck there, my p***y so good" " YEpa! I gave him snake in the monkey shadow style in the bedroom." My sister, get over your genitals, you are on a jonzing p. The only thing special about your p***y is the woman behind it. So if you're the type thinking that is enough to hold down a man I think I should give you a moment of silence. A guy simply sees it as a means to an end. Those of you that will go and sit down in a guy's house, be cheapening yourselves, rolling weed with him and his friends, playing video games, cleaning, cooking. None of that would eventually get you married. Men marry women they can trust. Women that have security, virtue and have a passion and ambition are the women that get wifed. So if you like let pant be wearing you.
4. Stop Making investments where there are no returns. Girls are experts at wasting their times. Girls can kill themselves over a guy that doesn't even take them seriously. I said it before and I'm saying it again. In solving most of the problems facing our kind today, we have to start by putting and end to the "attention-whore" disease. Girls are so desperate for attention these days that they allow themselves to be heartbroken unnecessarily. Girls break their own hearts 90percent of the time. Because a guy says hi to you or calls you doesn't mean you are his girlfriend. Always make sure you make your relationship with a guy defined before you start going overboard. Buying him vals gift, cooking for him, sleeping with him and so on. No guy would say no to a free chef and maid. Before you start offering your services, make sure you know what your getting yourselves into. The guy might even have someone already! He won't tell you obviously because he's enjoying the freebies he's getting from you. I see many girls around today and I just shake my head. Already giving themselves invisible boyfriend and really getting excited when the guy hasn't even done anything for them. They now begin to cry when they get dumped and the guy is the devil. If you weren't so stupid you won't be heartbroken.
5. You have the power. Despite the way the world would have us see it, we need to recognize that the ball is in our court. And we have the power to decide the course of our lives. We have the power to mould our man. We run the world. The downfall of many great men in history has been by women. Samson, Hitler, Abacha. Why did you think God created woman? There was something missing in the man's life, in the whole world. We are that extra touch, that spice. We are important, God made us not to be trophies or arm candies but to be helpers to the men. Work on yourself. Think longterm and not short term in everything you do. Always remember that patience is a virtue and see how that works out for you. Get rid of that "victim" mentality. We are not the weaker sex. We are stronger and we hold the reins.
It would also help for y'all to know:
6. There is no such thing as a perfect man.
7. A relationship with God is something you would eventually realise is an essential part of being a woman. Better start sooner than later.
8. Hating on other girls is even a worse waste of time than spending time with a guy that won't marry you. Stop being a fugly b**ch.
9. Whatever you do, wherever you find yourself, make yourself useful, learn a trade, acquire a skill! Don't just stand there waiting for a man to pay your bills.
10. Stop lying about your virginity and sexual history :'( nobody gives a shit! And you owe noone any explanation, not even your future husband. You are the owner of your body.
I hope I've been able to reach out to girls out there. Men, show your sisters this post, guys, your girlfriends should see this. Okay I'm going to stop here for today. You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
1. There is absolutely nothing special about you!!
Yes I said it. I know most of you must be taken aback by this. But yeah duh! Girls feel unnecessarily special when a guy walks up to them or tweets at them or shows them a little attention. You begin to feel like beyonce. My sister open your eyes! You and all the other girls are the same until you've proven yourself different at least in the eye of the guy. U av two breasts, so does the other girls, you have thighs, u have 2 buTt cheeks, you have one head every girl does! And you wanna know something, that's all that guy sees at first. So imagine how there are many of one thing and yet you feel special about it. Not very wise don't you think? The fact that one guy that is bored or wants to just catch cruise walks up to u doesn't mean you are the only one. Your value as a girl isn't measured by that. These niggas are just trying their luck. They know we like to feel special and they do just that to get into your pants. They tell you all sort of stories about how you are different, how your eyes sparkle in its own unique way, how everything about you is just right, your personality, your brains. Pssst! Do not fall for it. The question you ask them is "how did you know"? It's true. They are not close to you and they come from nowhere trying to make you feel like your some Goddess when all u have is one overused braz, a balance of 5k in your account, and a pair of fake louboutin shoes. Don't be fooled. You got a looooong way to go girl.
2. Your beauty is the least of your assets. If you are that girl that keeps dwelling on how "fine" you are, then I'm sorry for you. My dear girls, do not carry your beauty on your head. Ok so you are fine, you are gorgeous, what now happen? Sisters, there would always be a finer girl, there would always be a skinnier, fairer, curvier girl so hold it. Infact, at this time and age, everyone is beautiful! What with the fake hair, bleaching creams, instagram filters, contoured make up and so on. Stay there now, don't let anybody hear word you hear? Na you fine pass. You will just look around you and find out that one girl you once called "ugly and ratchet" is now even finer than you after a visit to mama Tega's shop. What are you gonna do then? The idea is, if everyone can have it, then it's not special anymore. Even the Bible always advised us as women to always work on being beautiful on the inside. A woman that has grace, virtue, brains, ambition, a woman with goals is the priceless jewel. Not you the local champion.
3. There is nothing special about the community p***y you are sharing.
Girls be like "ah! He is stuck there, my p***y so good" " YEpa! I gave him snake in the monkey shadow style in the bedroom." My sister, get over your genitals, you are on a jonzing p. The only thing special about your p***y is the woman behind it. So if you're the type thinking that is enough to hold down a man I think I should give you a moment of silence. A guy simply sees it as a means to an end. Those of you that will go and sit down in a guy's house, be cheapening yourselves, rolling weed with him and his friends, playing video games, cleaning, cooking. None of that would eventually get you married. Men marry women they can trust. Women that have security, virtue and have a passion and ambition are the women that get wifed. So if you like let pant be wearing you.
4. Stop Making investments where there are no returns. Girls are experts at wasting their times. Girls can kill themselves over a guy that doesn't even take them seriously. I said it before and I'm saying it again. In solving most of the problems facing our kind today, we have to start by putting and end to the "attention-whore" disease. Girls are so desperate for attention these days that they allow themselves to be heartbroken unnecessarily. Girls break their own hearts 90percent of the time. Because a guy says hi to you or calls you doesn't mean you are his girlfriend. Always make sure you make your relationship with a guy defined before you start going overboard. Buying him vals gift, cooking for him, sleeping with him and so on. No guy would say no to a free chef and maid. Before you start offering your services, make sure you know what your getting yourselves into. The guy might even have someone already! He won't tell you obviously because he's enjoying the freebies he's getting from you. I see many girls around today and I just shake my head. Already giving themselves invisible boyfriend and really getting excited when the guy hasn't even done anything for them. They now begin to cry when they get dumped and the guy is the devil. If you weren't so stupid you won't be heartbroken.
5. You have the power. Despite the way the world would have us see it, we need to recognize that the ball is in our court. And we have the power to decide the course of our lives. We have the power to mould our man. We run the world. The downfall of many great men in history has been by women. Samson, Hitler, Abacha. Why did you think God created woman? There was something missing in the man's life, in the whole world. We are that extra touch, that spice. We are important, God made us not to be trophies or arm candies but to be helpers to the men. Work on yourself. Think longterm and not short term in everything you do. Always remember that patience is a virtue and see how that works out for you. Get rid of that "victim" mentality. We are not the weaker sex. We are stronger and we hold the reins.
It would also help for y'all to know:
6. There is no such thing as a perfect man.
7. A relationship with God is something you would eventually realise is an essential part of being a woman. Better start sooner than later.
8. Hating on other girls is even a worse waste of time than spending time with a guy that won't marry you. Stop being a fugly b**ch.
9. Whatever you do, wherever you find yourself, make yourself useful, learn a trade, acquire a skill! Don't just stand there waiting for a man to pay your bills.
10. Stop lying about your virginity and sexual history :'( nobody gives a shit! And you owe noone any explanation, not even your future husband. You are the owner of your body.
I hope I've been able to reach out to girls out there. Men, show your sisters this post, guys, your girlfriends should see this. Okay I'm going to stop here for today. You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Saturday, February 8, 2014
UGLY
Now I can bet that we all have that someone in our lives who is always complaining and picking out flaws in EVERYTHING and everyone. Everyone is like "Omg she's so pretty" "Omg what a cute couple" "Omg I love her dress" and they just there like "she has a funny head" "nah its just the make up" "she ain't all that" "I'm sure they are not even faithful to eachother" "she has a birthmark on her ear" "she has a flat ass" nah that's the fake Louis vuitton he's wearing". Sound familiar? Yeah? I thought so. Those are the people you should stay far away from. They will drain all the joy in your life and turn you into sad bitter souls like themselves. These are the "professional haters". It's like they were created and designed to hate and are very good at it.
If you look deeply, you find out there is a hole somewhere in their life. An emptiness they need to fill up. An insufficiency, insecurity somewhere. They can't seem to fill it up, and they look for it in others. That imperfection that is leaving their lives void is exactly what they criticise in others. People have to learn to stop this bad behaviour! It doesn't speak well. Infact, when I find myself around people that keep ranting about what's wrong with everybody and the world and what not, I feel a lot of pity for them cuz I actually find it pathetic. I feel like giving them a pat on the back and ask them "what happened to you?" "who hurt you?" "it's gonna be okay" LOL. Honestly, we should all learn to embrace the fact that no human is perfect and ranting about someone else's "imperfection" , which by the way has been fully embraced by that individual, isn't going to change anything. The person is moving on with his or her life and you are just sitting there.. stuck on stupid. How sad.
The picture mentioned how it's the ugly girls who call people ugly the most. My dear ones from my personal experiences mehn, I concur oh. You all should just observe around you. That wide mouthed person that criticises people's looks is the least goodlooking person in the room most of the time. That wide mouthed dude that keeps emphasising on how some people are broke niggas is usually the brokest and that person that is criticising relationships and has the load down on all the couple's Jist, who's cheating with who and so on, hilariously is usually the single, lonely one. It's really funny.
My fellow Nigerians, you need to renew your minds. If you fall into this category of people please CHANGE. Your life would remain stagnant if you keep dwelling on the things that are missing in your life, looking for them in others. Those of you that have people like this around you, stay far away from them don't let them infect you oh.
Okay, imma stop here for now. Thanks for reading ;) You know I'm awesome xoxo
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
OLIVER TWIST
Hello dear readers, I know you all have missed me so much. I promise to write more often. I'm even writing exams right now but I just couldn't help but lift this off my mind. You see the topic up there? Sounds interesting right? The real topic should have been "NIGGA WHAT's WROOOONG WITCHU?". I'm seriously tired of men these days and their funny ways.
Recently, a few of my close friends have come forward with the same complaint.. unfaithful men. Now I know this so cliché. It's the order of the day. It's not a new thing. But as a deep thinker, I get really pissed when I try to decipher the rationale behind this animalistic behaviour that has eaten into our society. Where are all the good men? Is there any such thing as a faithful man? If he exists, BIKO where is he?
I'm using Nigeria as a case study today. I know this is a common occurrence everywhere in the world and has been going on long before I was born but really it is getting out of hand. Every young trendy and exposed girl can testify to a married man asking them out. Relationships are being broken everyday because of cheating partners. Now we are all humans, everybody makes mistakes but making it become a normal thing is what is annoying me.
Dear men, what is your problem? I'm really curious as to why yo just can't keep a good girl and be faithful to just that one girl. Why must you have a side chick? If u love so many beautiful women all at once why don't you remain single? Why subject an innocent lady to heartbreak and unnecessary stress? Is it by force? You see them everywhere. The married ones do not even care to hide their rings. Many of them already have women they have impregnated, paid bride price for, yet you see them chasing young pretty girls all around town. It just doesnt make sense to me. Is it the polygamst nature of African men thats the issue? Because these men include activists, public motivational speakers and even pastors. People that are supposed to be role models. They cant even be faithful to their partners. Is it the corrupt nature of Nigerians? The whole "corrupt leaders" issue we have in this country comes from the grassroots. The smallest child is already a corrupt Nigerian because he emulates his parents. Dishonesty is the order of the day. People are becoming more selfish, lustful and cruel by the day. That is why people are advised to love their partners. I as a person do not see the need to cheat on someone i love. The impulse doesnt just come to go and look for someone else. The question i ask myself is "what am i looking for"? If the woman of your dreams has a particular list of features, why not look for her and marry her? Why do you have to settle for less and start wasting your precious time and money on other women? You instead prefer to pick the unattractive, village girl and get her pregnant and leave her oppressed in your house and do whatever you like, destroying the lives of other men's future wives. The most annoying are these young boy that can barely fend for themselves, maltreating the girls that manage to give them attention and love. You go through the trouble to chase a particular girl, when you get her finally, you are still not satisfied and you are chasing after others. The poor girl is feeling like your one and only not knowing she has become a laughing stock because of you. Why the lies? Why do you have to use the mask of relationship to get into girl's pants? I believe the whole energy and time these men put into plotting and scheming can be used to do something more productive. The devil is obviously toying with the destinies of most men in this country.
We the girls have some of the blame also. The way you present yourself to a man is very important. There are many things we need to understand as girls. Maybe that would be my next post. Refuse to be taken for a fool. Refuse to fall for the same line over and over again. A man would do anything to get a woman he has set his eyes on so you girls can start by not being such attention whores and stop being freaked by what guys do to get down with you. Im hardly impressed by guys to be honest. I would rather sit back and watch them run in circles till they are exhausted.
Men should really stop this behaviour. And you can also drop in comments and reasons why men do what they do because honestly, im just lost. It is way too deep. Where can we find a good man? What went wrong?
Would stop here for now. You know i'm awesome, xoxo.
Recently, a few of my close friends have come forward with the same complaint.. unfaithful men. Now I know this so cliché. It's the order of the day. It's not a new thing. But as a deep thinker, I get really pissed when I try to decipher the rationale behind this animalistic behaviour that has eaten into our society. Where are all the good men? Is there any such thing as a faithful man? If he exists, BIKO where is he?
I'm using Nigeria as a case study today. I know this is a common occurrence everywhere in the world and has been going on long before I was born but really it is getting out of hand. Every young trendy and exposed girl can testify to a married man asking them out. Relationships are being broken everyday because of cheating partners. Now we are all humans, everybody makes mistakes but making it become a normal thing is what is annoying me.
Dear men, what is your problem? I'm really curious as to why yo just can't keep a good girl and be faithful to just that one girl. Why must you have a side chick? If u love so many beautiful women all at once why don't you remain single? Why subject an innocent lady to heartbreak and unnecessary stress? Is it by force? You see them everywhere. The married ones do not even care to hide their rings. Many of them already have women they have impregnated, paid bride price for, yet you see them chasing young pretty girls all around town. It just doesnt make sense to me. Is it the polygamst nature of African men thats the issue? Because these men include activists, public motivational speakers and even pastors. People that are supposed to be role models. They cant even be faithful to their partners. Is it the corrupt nature of Nigerians? The whole "corrupt leaders" issue we have in this country comes from the grassroots. The smallest child is already a corrupt Nigerian because he emulates his parents. Dishonesty is the order of the day. People are becoming more selfish, lustful and cruel by the day. That is why people are advised to love their partners. I as a person do not see the need to cheat on someone i love. The impulse doesnt just come to go and look for someone else. The question i ask myself is "what am i looking for"? If the woman of your dreams has a particular list of features, why not look for her and marry her? Why do you have to settle for less and start wasting your precious time and money on other women? You instead prefer to pick the unattractive, village girl and get her pregnant and leave her oppressed in your house and do whatever you like, destroying the lives of other men's future wives. The most annoying are these young boy that can barely fend for themselves, maltreating the girls that manage to give them attention and love. You go through the trouble to chase a particular girl, when you get her finally, you are still not satisfied and you are chasing after others. The poor girl is feeling like your one and only not knowing she has become a laughing stock because of you. Why the lies? Why do you have to use the mask of relationship to get into girl's pants? I believe the whole energy and time these men put into plotting and scheming can be used to do something more productive. The devil is obviously toying with the destinies of most men in this country.
We the girls have some of the blame also. The way you present yourself to a man is very important. There are many things we need to understand as girls. Maybe that would be my next post. Refuse to be taken for a fool. Refuse to fall for the same line over and over again. A man would do anything to get a woman he has set his eyes on so you girls can start by not being such attention whores and stop being freaked by what guys do to get down with you. Im hardly impressed by guys to be honest. I would rather sit back and watch them run in circles till they are exhausted.
Men should really stop this behaviour. And you can also drop in comments and reasons why men do what they do because honestly, im just lost. It is way too deep. Where can we find a good man? What went wrong?
Would stop here for now. You know i'm awesome, xoxo.
Monday, November 4, 2013
BE AT THE TOP OF YOUR GAME
Hello dear readers! I know I haven't posted in AGES infact I doubt y'all are even interested in whatever I might have to write lool! (yeah right, you wish) I wouldn't pretend that the ongoing ASUU strike is the reason behind my suspected "writer's block" infact I don't think I'm having any writer's block. I must agree to something though, the energy around here, for me atleast has gone pretty bleak. The situation of things, pardon my language, is shitty. Maybe a change in environment would do the trick though I tried that. Anyways, long story short, we all just pushing it. God is in control. We just gotta keep a positive mindset and stay happy, which is pretty much what this post is all about. Came across this amazing write up and just had to share with you all. This post is not for Christians alone. Principles from the Bible were only extracted to emphasise the message being passed across. Enjoy...
1 Peter 3:10-12 KJV
For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile: [11] Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it. [12] For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil.
1 Peter 3:8-9 KJV
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: [9] Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
1.Quit wanting to be someone else.
Have value for yourself. Be happy about You! The first person you have is you. God values you and if he does, you should have value for yourself.
Your responsibility is to bring the best outta you. The Holy Ghost has different manifestations through us and as such we can only bring forth what we have sown into ourselves. The question is how do we sow into ourselves? You are the harvest of the seeds sown by your parents, school, friends, media etc. To make an adjustment, you need to introduce new seeds, not by praying or discussing the issue. What is le ft is to sow those seeds in to you. Become satisfied first that God wants you and has you. Receive inspiring words and stop your ears from the wrong stuff.
Matthew 15:6 KJV
And honour not his father or his mother, he shall be free . Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition.
Beleive is what God has made you. You are an expression of the seeds you have planted, the books you read, the movies you watch. They all have an impact on you. It is deceit to say they have no effect.
If a baby stays in a room all his life and does not talk to anyone, he will grow up not knowing how to talk. That's because he received no words while growing and neither heard them and as such won't know how to talk.
We have messages on the inside we wanna express. And when someone doesn't understand us, we respond with anger and frustration. Words are the most beautiful gift given to us by God. Words dheet our lives."your life goes in the direction of your words". You are a product of your words. When you hurt others with your words, you destroy the programming of good and righteousness in you.Your life turns in the wrong direction because you are programmed to bless with words.
2.Quit trying to change other people.
Don't write someone off if they have refused to change. You really can't change anybody not even with prayer.
The question is why do you want to change them? While we were yet sinners, christ died for us. He didn't wait for us to change. People don't really need to change, they are all wonderful the way they are. Paul said,"I am all things to all men" meaning he accepted them the way they were. On his way to damascus, he wanted to change others but God changed that and gave him "a message". That was the change, so others could receive salvation and a remission of sins. People wanna become what God wants them to be not what you want them to become. If you love people for who they are, they discover their value, and move in that direction of who they are in christ. Quite trying to change others because you are trying to say you are better than they are. What does God think about that? It's not right of course. Jesus is the true expression of the father, we can only give examples with ourselves of him and he thus shows us a picture. When we show a picture of Jesus for others to see(through yourself), they see themselves. That's amazing! You see a glorified you when you see a picture of the master!!! Ayaaaaa!!!!! When they see the picture, they see themselves. God's expression of Jesus, the living word is a mirror, and as we look, we see a beautiful, righteousness,glorious us and we become successful. That's the message to the whole world! Quit changing others and setting standards for others, show them Jesus, the ultimate standard and with time, there will be improvements.
1 Thessalonians 4:11 KJV
And ye study to be quiet, and to Do YOUR OWN BUSINESS, and to work with your own hands; as we have commanded you
To have an extraordinary life,
Value you
Stop trying to change others, it's more like saying they should imitate you.
3. Quit judging others
You will be amazed how wonderful people are, ignore the wrong parts,it's none of your business, lead a quiet life, dwell on the good parts. As long as you are into other people's business, you will never be happy. That will cause you to be frustrated, get off other people's lives . The more you go into other people's business, you judge them and become critical and see only the wrongs. This causes you to dislike other people you don't know. "A gossip spreads the message but a righteousness man stops it". Put a stop to the gossip about others. When you slander others, it's wrong. Don't tell stories that will make others dislike or hate another, give a good picture of others, it's your responsibility. Propagate love because you are the offspring of love, not hate.
When the prostitute who was caught fornicating was brought to Jesus and they all wanted to test him saying,"this woman broke the law of Moses,what should we do to her"?
Jesus ignored them. Jesus does what his father does, when you judge others, God ignores you! All he did was tell whoever was without sin to cast the first stone! One by one, they dropped their stones. Jesus then told the woman, where are thine prosecutors? She said no one and Jesus said he condemned her neither . Jesus was on his way to the cross to set this woman free and told her to go and sin no more, he recognised her sin and told her to go and sin no more. He took her place on the cross, defended her before God for her transgressions and bore our punishments. "Judge not so that ye may not be judged". Consider being in other people's shoes, if others don't have the knowledge you have,don't judge them cos if they knew what you knew, they wouldn't be in their predicament. Understanding the scriptures is a miracle and if God didn't help you, you wouldn't be where you are. This shows you are not necessarily better than others, it makes you thankful and more humble that the Holy Ghost could teach you. So when you see others not acting accordingly or going to church, you become thankfully that God helped you and that you are where you are. Be thankful God helped you to listen to the word or hear the Holy Ghost. People in Jesus time didn't know the truth yet they accused him of being a fraud.
Be thankful you know what you know about God, to have a feel of God and to listen to words of life. Prayer for those who don't know and can't receive the word and the understanding of the word will come to them. You don't know how they grew up or their childhood, just pray that their minds are open.
You can be a success and be at the top of your game if you do these things:
-be the best of what God has made you to be
-don't try to make others what they are not, let them be the best of what God has made them
-bridle your tongue and speak no evil of others
-mind your own business
-judge not others
Have a lovely day and month ahead.
1 Peter 3:10-12 KJV
For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile: [11] Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it. [12] For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil.
1 Peter 3:8-9 KJV
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: [9] Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
1.Quit wanting to be someone else.
Have value for yourself. Be happy about You! The first person you have is you. God values you and if he does, you should have value for yourself.
Your responsibility is to bring the best outta you. The Holy Ghost has different manifestations through us and as such we can only bring forth what we have sown into ourselves. The question is how do we sow into ourselves? You are the harvest of the seeds sown by your parents, school, friends, media etc. To make an adjustment, you need to introduce new seeds, not by praying or discussing the issue. What is le ft is to sow those seeds in to you. Become satisfied first that God wants you and has you. Receive inspiring words and stop your ears from the wrong stuff.
Matthew 15:6 KJV
And honour not his father or his mother, he shall be free . Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition.
Beleive is what God has made you. You are an expression of the seeds you have planted, the books you read, the movies you watch. They all have an impact on you. It is deceit to say they have no effect.
If a baby stays in a room all his life and does not talk to anyone, he will grow up not knowing how to talk. That's because he received no words while growing and neither heard them and as such won't know how to talk.
We have messages on the inside we wanna express. And when someone doesn't understand us, we respond with anger and frustration. Words are the most beautiful gift given to us by God. Words dheet our lives."your life goes in the direction of your words". You are a product of your words. When you hurt others with your words, you destroy the programming of good and righteousness in you.Your life turns in the wrong direction because you are programmed to bless with words.
2.Quit trying to change other people.
Don't write someone off if they have refused to change. You really can't change anybody not even with prayer.
The question is why do you want to change them? While we were yet sinners, christ died for us. He didn't wait for us to change. People don't really need to change, they are all wonderful the way they are. Paul said,"I am all things to all men" meaning he accepted them the way they were. On his way to damascus, he wanted to change others but God changed that and gave him "a message". That was the change, so others could receive salvation and a remission of sins. People wanna become what God wants them to be not what you want them to become. If you love people for who they are, they discover their value, and move in that direction of who they are in christ. Quite trying to change others because you are trying to say you are better than they are. What does God think about that? It's not right of course. Jesus is the true expression of the father, we can only give examples with ourselves of him and he thus shows us a picture. When we show a picture of Jesus for others to see(through yourself), they see themselves. That's amazing! You see a glorified you when you see a picture of the master!!! Ayaaaaa!!!!! When they see the picture, they see themselves. God's expression of Jesus, the living word is a mirror, and as we look, we see a beautiful, righteousness,glorious us and we become successful. That's the message to the whole world! Quit changing others and setting standards for others, show them Jesus, the ultimate standard and with time, there will be improvements.
1 Thessalonians 4:11 KJV
And ye study to be quiet, and to Do YOUR OWN BUSINESS, and to work with your own hands; as we have commanded you
To have an extraordinary life,
Value you
Stop trying to change others, it's more like saying they should imitate you.
3. Quit judging others
You will be amazed how wonderful people are, ignore the wrong parts,it's none of your business, lead a quiet life, dwell on the good parts. As long as you are into other people's business, you will never be happy. That will cause you to be frustrated, get off other people's lives . The more you go into other people's business, you judge them and become critical and see only the wrongs. This causes you to dislike other people you don't know. "A gossip spreads the message but a righteousness man stops it". Put a stop to the gossip about others. When you slander others, it's wrong. Don't tell stories that will make others dislike or hate another, give a good picture of others, it's your responsibility. Propagate love because you are the offspring of love, not hate.
When the prostitute who was caught fornicating was brought to Jesus and they all wanted to test him saying,"this woman broke the law of Moses,what should we do to her"?
Jesus ignored them. Jesus does what his father does, when you judge others, God ignores you! All he did was tell whoever was without sin to cast the first stone! One by one, they dropped their stones. Jesus then told the woman, where are thine prosecutors? She said no one and Jesus said he condemned her neither . Jesus was on his way to the cross to set this woman free and told her to go and sin no more, he recognised her sin and told her to go and sin no more. He took her place on the cross, defended her before God for her transgressions and bore our punishments. "Judge not so that ye may not be judged". Consider being in other people's shoes, if others don't have the knowledge you have,don't judge them cos if they knew what you knew, they wouldn't be in their predicament. Understanding the scriptures is a miracle and if God didn't help you, you wouldn't be where you are. This shows you are not necessarily better than others, it makes you thankful and more humble that the Holy Ghost could teach you. So when you see others not acting accordingly or going to church, you become thankfully that God helped you and that you are where you are. Be thankful God helped you to listen to the word or hear the Holy Ghost. People in Jesus time didn't know the truth yet they accused him of being a fraud.
Be thankful you know what you know about God, to have a feel of God and to listen to words of life. Prayer for those who don't know and can't receive the word and the understanding of the word will come to them. You don't know how they grew up or their childhood, just pray that their minds are open.
You can be a success and be at the top of your game if you do these things:
-be the best of what God has made you to be
-don't try to make others what they are not, let them be the best of what God has made them
-bridle your tongue and speak no evil of others
-mind your own business
-judge not others
Have a lovely day and month ahead.
Sunday, June 30, 2013
DO NOT SWEAT IT
"Do not let people who do so little for you control ur emotions..." This statement is resounding in my head as i lay here thinking, reflecting. So many things that have happened in the past. So many people that have walked in and out of my life within this short time I've spent on this earth. I look back at the people that used to matter.. Where are they today? This life is just filled with passing things and people. No one and nobody is permanent. I think about the people I've put my trust in and they felt I couldnt get stuff done without them. LOL. How do humans become so narrow-minded? Do i blame it on "human nature"? Or do we just allow "the Devil" to play ball with our minds and decieve us into thinking that for some reason we have arrived! And we are so mighty and powerful that we can do whatever the hell we want with our fellow humans' lives and feelings. How do we get so cold without even realizing it? The heart of man, the Bible says, is "Desperately Wicked".
I laugh as I think back and I'm very grateful to Almighty God for always showing and constantly proving what was written in His Word that He can raise up stones if humans wld choose to ignore Him. The stones can do ur work! So why feel indispensable. When you're in a position to be of help to someone or when you're responsible for someone why not take up the opportunity to be a blessing rather than be an oppressor? When in a relationship with someone why not use the opportunity to impart your best in that person and be remembered for something good than listening to the voice of your own genitals or bank account? When in the position to be a friend why not actually be a friend than seeking what you are going to gain from the alliance or seeking to bring others down instead. Why lead that girl on just cuz you know she'll do anything you say and take advantage of her? Why go into anything at all if your mind isnt in it? No one is forcing anybody! The reasons why we humans do these things is still beyond me. But we still gotta live and shake off all these obstacles and be strong. Im learning everyday to do that.
"I survived without you".. So much satisfaction in that statement! At this point i believe in three things:
1. People come and go,
2. Money comes and goes and
3. You can have whatsoever you desire if you put your mind to it and trust God. Only God.
Humans are selfish, self-centered, self- seeking. In the end nobody really gives a damn about your feelings. The earlier you come to realize that the better it is for you. What really slows people down in life is the value attach to people that are not worth it. Now im not saying you should not care for your neighbour like the Lord commanded, but you shouldnt let people make you lose focus.
The answer is simple. Do not focus your mind on things that are temporary. Do not allow anyone to walk all over you just because they sense you have a soft spot for them. People are temporary. Nothing lasts forever. The only thing that lasts forever is the Kingdom of God. Do things without expecting anything in return because expectations lead to disappointments and disappointments break hearts. If someone isnt gonna help you with something, someone else will. If he doesnt treat you right, someone else will. If she cheats on you, theres someone out there who wont. My people, get rid of the unnecessary baggage. Im not scared of losing anyone so much that they would hold me back. No sir. We all need to learn to breathe. Do something that makes you trully happy. Dont let your emotions get the best of you. They are within your control. Anyone who says they arent is lying to you. Im talking from experience when i sincerely say evrything is vanity!! Stuff you could kill for a few months ago, you look back and you're like, "seriously"?? It happens every damn time. People included! Those u couldnt go a day without talking to them some time ago, you go weeks without even a thought about them. Thatmy dear readers, is life! What you now did within the period you were in an illusion is what u're left with. And then you look back and think, "what was even my gain"? "What did he/ she even do for me"? Do not be a loser. If only we can all be patient! we would quit making the same mistakes over and over again.
Do not let people that do so little for you take over your thoughts, time, money and emotions. These things are gifts from God. Use them wisely. Live everyday like its your last. So if you die today you would know you lived YOUR life. Biko, that is not why Jesus came to die for us. He came that we should have life and have it in abundance. Not so we can fret day and night about bullshit. Make up your mind today! Do something for You! ;)
You know im awesome... Xoxo
Thursday, June 27, 2013
PICTURE PERFECT
I want a man, who isn't afraid to show how he feels. A man who won't lie in the heat of the moment to get what he wants and in the long run can't keep up with the words he said and all my hopes and dreams shatter in just a split second! I want a man that would make me his one and only, no other girls matter, I'm all he sees, I'm all he wants, I'm all he could ever ask for and he doesn't make me know this by just telling me, I know it deep within my bones because his actions speak well enough.
I want a man that will understand me. A man that knows what make me tick! A man that knows those exact things that get me upset and wouldn't dare do them because he cannot bear to see even the slightest wrinkle in my forehead. I want a man whose smile is in mine, whose sadness is in mine.
This man doesn't pressure me to get physical with him. Not in the slightest way!! He listens when I talk. He holds me wen I'm hurt and knows just how to make me smile no matter where I am or what I am going through. He knows that when I scream at him and tell him to get away from me he won't go because he knows all I really need is on the other side of the door.
All he wants is my happiness and only then is he happy. I am his everything and he is my everything. And we couldn't be any more happier.
He wants the best for me. He is not jealous of my achievements. He is always there at every step of the way. Advicing me when its needed. He never makes me feel like I should be some place else. He never makes me have to tell him how lucky he is to have me among all the men. He knows this, he breathes this and he reminds me moment.
He is self-sufficient, he is independent. He is focused, he wants the best for me. I am his queen and he actually treats me as such! And I will always travel first class! I deserve nothing less! He is my protector! No one says bullshit about me and gets away with it! His friends know me. They also know he doesn't joke with me. He takes care of me when I'm ill. And he doesn't put his feelings above mine because he is secure, emotionally, mentally and financially. He can vouch for me wherever he goes. His trust for me is endearing. I wouldn't ever want to go against him. He knows what he wants in a woman! He isn't confused like lost sheep running helter-skelter. I am the woman of his dreams and he knows this won't last just for a while. He knows that if he goes away from this world and is asked to choose again, he wouldn't have to ask for any other woman. He has found home, his resting place.
I just want a man that won't break my heart.
I want.. I want..This man is an illusion, a distant dream, a fantasy. He doesn't exist and never will. :(
Straight from the heart. A woman unlucky in love...
You know I'm awesome, xoxo
I want a man that will understand me. A man that knows what make me tick! A man that knows those exact things that get me upset and wouldn't dare do them because he cannot bear to see even the slightest wrinkle in my forehead. I want a man whose smile is in mine, whose sadness is in mine.
This man doesn't pressure me to get physical with him. Not in the slightest way!! He listens when I talk. He holds me wen I'm hurt and knows just how to make me smile no matter where I am or what I am going through. He knows that when I scream at him and tell him to get away from me he won't go because he knows all I really need is on the other side of the door.
All he wants is my happiness and only then is he happy. I am his everything and he is my everything. And we couldn't be any more happier.
He wants the best for me. He is not jealous of my achievements. He is always there at every step of the way. Advicing me when its needed. He never makes me feel like I should be some place else. He never makes me have to tell him how lucky he is to have me among all the men. He knows this, he breathes this and he reminds me moment.
He is self-sufficient, he is independent. He is focused, he wants the best for me. I am his queen and he actually treats me as such! And I will always travel first class! I deserve nothing less! He is my protector! No one says bullshit about me and gets away with it! His friends know me. They also know he doesn't joke with me. He takes care of me when I'm ill. And he doesn't put his feelings above mine because he is secure, emotionally, mentally and financially. He can vouch for me wherever he goes. His trust for me is endearing. I wouldn't ever want to go against him. He knows what he wants in a woman! He isn't confused like lost sheep running helter-skelter. I am the woman of his dreams and he knows this won't last just for a while. He knows that if he goes away from this world and is asked to choose again, he wouldn't have to ask for any other woman. He has found home, his resting place.
I just want a man that won't break my heart.
I want.. I want..This man is an illusion, a distant dream, a fantasy. He doesn't exist and never will. :(
Straight from the heart. A woman unlucky in love...
You know I'm awesome, xoxo
GIRL ON FIRE
She's like the wind! She walks into your life and you don't know what had hit you! You could try but you can never forget her name. This girl is on fire.
She is empowered, strong, non-conformist, intuitive and futuristic . She always follows her instincts because they have never failed her. Yet she is quite rational. This girl doesn't have to do what everyone else is doing to have self- fulfillment. She is not in anyway shallow! A girl with the fear of God in her. She is a homemaker yet an independent woman. A woman with drive and focus. She has an ambition, she has a dream. Any man who has her would be considered lucky.
She's patient she's kind and she's principled. She is the pride of her father and he shows her off to all his friends. She is beautiful beyond compare, she is well aware of it and yet doesn't let her world revolve around her personal appearance. A woman of class, she prides herself in her ability to help others with the little she has. Beauty is vain. It will all go away someday. What is left is the virtue your parents have instilled in her and all she has learned as she has disciplined herself.
When she talks, people listen. And when she walks into a room, she brings smiles to peoples faces. She always keeps her cool and is level-headed. Her silence speaks volumes. She is not a girl pining for attention, she's a woman who demands respect. She values this over everything. She is not bothered about what people say about her. She just gives herself to you like a transparent bag. "Take me or leave me" is her watch word. She would never sell out. A woman of strong character she is. She would never compromise because she's trying to impress anyone. She also isn't impressed by the vanity of the things of this world. After all, naked we come naked we go. If she wants something she goes for it. She sees everything as a means to an end. An opportunist in the real sense of things. She doesn't let anyone or anything stand in her way. No shortcuts in this girl's world. Hard work, prayer and determination are the means to achieving goals.
She has flaws. She's imperfect. But her perfections lies within her ability to come to terms with her imperfection. She could be the most stubborn person you've ever met! She is rebellious! Revolutionary! She could freak you out sometimes with her coldness. She is erratic (even bipolar) but she would never intentionally hurt anyone. She defies prejudice and stands up for the rights of the ones being discriminated. She can't stand injustice. Call her rebellious, unconventional or even crazy. But she would not give up her seat! Call her inappropriate and quirky. She's on fire.
Life has been tough on her. She has gone through storms, trials and tribulation, heartbreak. She has been pushed way past the point of breaking. But she refuses to let these things overcome her. She has been deceived, taken advantage of. She has reached the point of being ready to give up. But the fire inside. The drive to keep moving. Has kept her strong. The spirit of God in her doesn't allow her to be subdued by the tempest in this world. Of all the unfortunate things that have befallen her she chooses to move on and leave the past in the past.
She has been in love. It hurt. Oh so bad it did. But she believes in one thing- you never lose for loving. She is a winner, a champion in whatever she does. She is never scared to love again. She is brave beyond human understanding. And other girls cannot decipher what she's on about. She dances to another beat entirely. In fact she plays her own drum. A true role model she is. All the girls want to be like her. But they just can't be her. All the men desire her. She is for everyone and belongs to no one. She's just a lonely girl in this lonely world who hopes that one day she's going to achieve her goals of touching lives and find that someone who truly deserves her and accepts her, flaws and all.
She's just a girl but the fire that burns inside is everlasting. Do not let anyone douch that inner flame girls! Keep it burning. You know I'm awesome xoxo.
She is empowered, strong, non-conformist, intuitive and futuristic . She always follows her instincts because they have never failed her. Yet she is quite rational. This girl doesn't have to do what everyone else is doing to have self- fulfillment. She is not in anyway shallow! A girl with the fear of God in her. She is a homemaker yet an independent woman. A woman with drive and focus. She has an ambition, she has a dream. Any man who has her would be considered lucky.
She's patient she's kind and she's principled. She is the pride of her father and he shows her off to all his friends. She is beautiful beyond compare, she is well aware of it and yet doesn't let her world revolve around her personal appearance. A woman of class, she prides herself in her ability to help others with the little she has. Beauty is vain. It will all go away someday. What is left is the virtue your parents have instilled in her and all she has learned as she has disciplined herself.
When she talks, people listen. And when she walks into a room, she brings smiles to peoples faces. She always keeps her cool and is level-headed. Her silence speaks volumes. She is not a girl pining for attention, she's a woman who demands respect. She values this over everything. She is not bothered about what people say about her. She just gives herself to you like a transparent bag. "Take me or leave me" is her watch word. She would never sell out. A woman of strong character she is. She would never compromise because she's trying to impress anyone. She also isn't impressed by the vanity of the things of this world. After all, naked we come naked we go. If she wants something she goes for it. She sees everything as a means to an end. An opportunist in the real sense of things. She doesn't let anyone or anything stand in her way. No shortcuts in this girl's world. Hard work, prayer and determination are the means to achieving goals.
She has flaws. She's imperfect. But her perfections lies within her ability to come to terms with her imperfection. She could be the most stubborn person you've ever met! She is rebellious! Revolutionary! She could freak you out sometimes with her coldness. She is erratic (even bipolar) but she would never intentionally hurt anyone. She defies prejudice and stands up for the rights of the ones being discriminated. She can't stand injustice. Call her rebellious, unconventional or even crazy. But she would not give up her seat! Call her inappropriate and quirky. She's on fire.
Life has been tough on her. She has gone through storms, trials and tribulation, heartbreak. She has been pushed way past the point of breaking. But she refuses to let these things overcome her. She has been deceived, taken advantage of. She has reached the point of being ready to give up. But the fire inside. The drive to keep moving. Has kept her strong. The spirit of God in her doesn't allow her to be subdued by the tempest in this world. Of all the unfortunate things that have befallen her she chooses to move on and leave the past in the past.
She has been in love. It hurt. Oh so bad it did. But she believes in one thing- you never lose for loving. She is a winner, a champion in whatever she does. She is never scared to love again. She is brave beyond human understanding. And other girls cannot decipher what she's on about. She dances to another beat entirely. In fact she plays her own drum. A true role model she is. All the girls want to be like her. But they just can't be her. All the men desire her. She is for everyone and belongs to no one. She's just a lonely girl in this lonely world who hopes that one day she's going to achieve her goals of touching lives and find that someone who truly deserves her and accepts her, flaws and all.
She's just a girl but the fire that burns inside is everlasting. Do not let anyone douch that inner flame girls! Keep it burning. You know I'm awesome xoxo.
PIECES OF ME
So I'm lying in my bed 1am in d morning can't bring myself to sleep. A heavy heavy mind filled with thoughts that make me wanna explode! The question that's running through my head. Why why why? An innocent question has caused such unsettlement in my mind. My spirit is weak my soul is paralyzed. Why do we do the things we do?
Funny how I cant always answer that. Why am I at this point in my life. Why am I here? Its like I'm in a constant search of something and unknowingly, subconciously, I'm taking measures to get it. Most of which are erratic. Oh well, I'm the queen of the radical as an uranian. Just when I feel fulfilled something draws me back. This lack of satisfaction. This constant craving for MORE. Nothing is ever enough. There's a little voice deep within my mind whispering "what if what you're looking for is right in front of you" but my heart tells me otherwise. My heart is yearning.
I'm like a traveller, an explorer. My journey began at the prime of my youth (lol, I'm STILL at the prime of my youth) and I've still not stopped searching. Infact, I'm not even always aware of it. In the general sense of speaking I'm a picture of contentment and perfection. I am in all ramifications living a "life in the fab lane" so to speak. But I can't calm down I can't stop searching.
I've been through pain and disappointments that make me want to stop feeling anything. I just can't stop. I feel numb. I'm a blank page. I'm also scared that I may never find what I'm looking for or that I have found it and lost it or I am staring right at it and it doesn't even regard or recognise me. What if what I'm searching for doesn't exist!!
I turn to Christ for fulfilment and try to be steadfast and I suddenly feel safe and secure and know everything is working out for good just because He's alive. I wanna burst out in joy for the precious gift of the Holy Ghost. How dirty stinky me is brought to the level of a God by just One Man. Feels great and glorious!
But then this world is full of mystery. Mysteries I'm yet too explore. The laws of society keeps limiting, the devil keeps trying to trap me with guilt. I try to shake him off. I dnt wanna hear it. Lord deliver me! I don't wanna be any part of this! Why can't I just forget myself and become like the saints? Why this torture? This constant battle against my own flesh! At this point I feel like I'm drowning. I need to escape. I need answers. I need strength. Oh yes, we all do.
I don't know if its just me or if all my readers can relate to this... You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Funny how I cant always answer that. Why am I at this point in my life. Why am I here? Its like I'm in a constant search of something and unknowingly, subconciously, I'm taking measures to get it. Most of which are erratic. Oh well, I'm the queen of the radical as an uranian. Just when I feel fulfilled something draws me back. This lack of satisfaction. This constant craving for MORE. Nothing is ever enough. There's a little voice deep within my mind whispering "what if what you're looking for is right in front of you" but my heart tells me otherwise. My heart is yearning.
I'm like a traveller, an explorer. My journey began at the prime of my youth (lol, I'm STILL at the prime of my youth) and I've still not stopped searching. Infact, I'm not even always aware of it. In the general sense of speaking I'm a picture of contentment and perfection. I am in all ramifications living a "life in the fab lane" so to speak. But I can't calm down I can't stop searching.
I've been through pain and disappointments that make me want to stop feeling anything. I just can't stop. I feel numb. I'm a blank page. I'm also scared that I may never find what I'm looking for or that I have found it and lost it or I am staring right at it and it doesn't even regard or recognise me. What if what I'm searching for doesn't exist!!
I turn to Christ for fulfilment and try to be steadfast and I suddenly feel safe and secure and know everything is working out for good just because He's alive. I wanna burst out in joy for the precious gift of the Holy Ghost. How dirty stinky me is brought to the level of a God by just One Man. Feels great and glorious!
But then this world is full of mystery. Mysteries I'm yet too explore. The laws of society keeps limiting, the devil keeps trying to trap me with guilt. I try to shake him off. I dnt wanna hear it. Lord deliver me! I don't wanna be any part of this! Why can't I just forget myself and become like the saints? Why this torture? This constant battle against my own flesh! At this point I feel like I'm drowning. I need to escape. I need answers. I need strength. Oh yes, we all do.
I don't know if its just me or if all my readers can relate to this... You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Destroyed In Love
"Have you ever loved somebody so much it makes you cry?
Have you ever needed something so bad you can't sleep at night?
Have you ever tried to find the words but they don't come out right?
Have you ever?"
These words from Brandy's song are racing all over my head tonight. Its all about love. Why does it hurt so bad? Why is it so damn uncontrollable?
It is commonly said, "You can't help who you love". It is even more painful when you finally fall in love and can't be with the one you love. Have you ever been in a situation whereby you hope and wish with all your heart that you didn't have to feel this feeling they call love. And if you had your way, you would be as cold as ice. But hold up, "if you had your way"?? Then really, whose way is this thing really going? What is this force you cannot control that just picks someone who could be the end of you? It is the question I'm still pondering tonight. I heard somewhere, love is a ruthless game unless you play it good. I totally agree about the ruthless part. As for it being a game, a game is within your own control last I checked. Love is something we all can't control and it gets me every time.
It starts with a simple attraction. A spark. Something about that person is exciting to you but you can't put a finger on it. Your system turns upside down whenever you see the person. You conclude its a "crush". Then it happens! It doesn't simply end there. You get talking, you can't have enough of this person and the person seems equally keen. A little kiss and touch here and there. You're literarily going crazy! You jump up whenever that red light blinks on your blackberry, hoping its that special someone. You are mentally dancing "alingo" whenever the phone rings and you see that name flash across the screen of your phone. Its all roses and pearls. You make eachother laugh and fight over the most petty issues. Its so cute and your friends are wondering what's making you glow. You just want to keep talking about this particular person. That's all you want to talk about, that's all you want to think. of. You're all he also thinks of. You just can't get enough.
With the way this story is going, it does deserve an happy ending. But the problems set in when one person stops trying. Or for some reason, you both "can't be together". Oh how that hurts! You've sworn not to give your heart away. But here you are anyways. You're completely drowned. Now everything he does counts as something else. Things you could overlook with anyone becomes a big deal with this person. If he replies you in a particular manner while texting, you begin to feel bad or if he doesn't call you or doesn't text you as often as he used to. You try to talk sense into yourself and shake it off "He didn't come to this world cuz of you", "he has other things doing now". No matter how hard you try to convince yourself you know deep down, something is wrong. Somewhere in the midst of the blur of "love" you missed out on something.
You probably forgot that he is married or in a relationship which is more important to him than you can ever be. You probably forgot that you were just the girl he met at the club or on twitter. Someone you just have a chat with whenever you both are bored and you were not supposed to be anything more than friends with benefits.
Uh oh, sweetie, you must have bumped your head. Where did your brain go? What were you really thinking? Pause, you reflect, and wonder "was I even "thinking"? Yeah. It has got you! You caught the love bug. Last you checked it was "just a crush" but this crush isn't going away and its eating you up like a termite eats wood. You realize that while you where spending all this time obsessing over this person, you indeed bumped your head.
You knew deep down all along that this was not healthy. You tried to stop it. You ran but couldn't hide. It all happened anyways and there was absolutely nothing you could do about it. *sigh*. The one word answers, the less frequent calls, and texts and all the possible signals in the world that screams "Swerve"! Then you get the message. All you're left with is a pool of emotions you cannot control. You don't know what to do with these feelings and they are choking you by the day. You're about to burst. Destroyed in love..
The only question I can ask at this point is "Why"? Why *evuls*? Why didn't God just confine us to falling in love with the person you're supposed to be with. The world would be a less hurtful place to live in!
Moral of the story though: ðon't be foolish. Don't fall in love and don't even think about it. Lol
Have you ever needed something so bad you can't sleep at night?
Have you ever tried to find the words but they don't come out right?
Have you ever?"
These words from Brandy's song are racing all over my head tonight. Its all about love. Why does it hurt so bad? Why is it so damn uncontrollable?
It is commonly said, "You can't help who you love". It is even more painful when you finally fall in love and can't be with the one you love. Have you ever been in a situation whereby you hope and wish with all your heart that you didn't have to feel this feeling they call love. And if you had your way, you would be as cold as ice. But hold up, "if you had your way"?? Then really, whose way is this thing really going? What is this force you cannot control that just picks someone who could be the end of you? It is the question I'm still pondering tonight. I heard somewhere, love is a ruthless game unless you play it good. I totally agree about the ruthless part. As for it being a game, a game is within your own control last I checked. Love is something we all can't control and it gets me every time.
It starts with a simple attraction. A spark. Something about that person is exciting to you but you can't put a finger on it. Your system turns upside down whenever you see the person. You conclude its a "crush". Then it happens! It doesn't simply end there. You get talking, you can't have enough of this person and the person seems equally keen. A little kiss and touch here and there. You're literarily going crazy! You jump up whenever that red light blinks on your blackberry, hoping its that special someone. You are mentally dancing "alingo" whenever the phone rings and you see that name flash across the screen of your phone. Its all roses and pearls. You make eachother laugh and fight over the most petty issues. Its so cute and your friends are wondering what's making you glow. You just want to keep talking about this particular person. That's all you want to talk about, that's all you want to think. of. You're all he also thinks of. You just can't get enough.
With the way this story is going, it does deserve an happy ending. But the problems set in when one person stops trying. Or for some reason, you both "can't be together". Oh how that hurts! You've sworn not to give your heart away. But here you are anyways. You're completely drowned. Now everything he does counts as something else. Things you could overlook with anyone becomes a big deal with this person. If he replies you in a particular manner while texting, you begin to feel bad or if he doesn't call you or doesn't text you as often as he used to. You try to talk sense into yourself and shake it off "He didn't come to this world cuz of you", "he has other things doing now". No matter how hard you try to convince yourself you know deep down, something is wrong. Somewhere in the midst of the blur of "love" you missed out on something.
You probably forgot that he is married or in a relationship which is more important to him than you can ever be. You probably forgot that you were just the girl he met at the club or on twitter. Someone you just have a chat with whenever you both are bored and you were not supposed to be anything more than friends with benefits.
Uh oh, sweetie, you must have bumped your head. Where did your brain go? What were you really thinking? Pause, you reflect, and wonder "was I even "thinking"? Yeah. It has got you! You caught the love bug. Last you checked it was "just a crush" but this crush isn't going away and its eating you up like a termite eats wood. You realize that while you where spending all this time obsessing over this person, you indeed bumped your head.
You knew deep down all along that this was not healthy. You tried to stop it. You ran but couldn't hide. It all happened anyways and there was absolutely nothing you could do about it. *sigh*. The one word answers, the less frequent calls, and texts and all the possible signals in the world that screams "Swerve"! Then you get the message. All you're left with is a pool of emotions you cannot control. You don't know what to do with these feelings and they are choking you by the day. You're about to burst. Destroyed in love..
The only question I can ask at this point is "Why"? Why *evuls*? Why didn't God just confine us to falling in love with the person you're supposed to be with. The world would be a less hurtful place to live in!
Moral of the story though: ðon't be foolish. Don't fall in love and don't even think about it. Lol
Saturday, November 24, 2012
INSECURITY
So I was just tweeting from my official account, @honey_ricci (of course you all are free to follow the page) and i got an inspiration to write on this very pressing issue of insecurity. What triggered this? A simple tweet on my timeline about a girl that was obviously "wearing bum bum" in her avatar. this of course is not a new invention to me, neither is it new to any of the Lagos girl's reading this post and even some of the men! I am not here to talk about the infamous 'bum bum pad" that has raged the hostels of several female students today.That is barely the point! it is just a little node on this big tree called INSECURITY.
Living in Lagos and Nigeria as a whole has thought me the bitterness behind insecurity. I have learnt not to trust anything anyone is saying because they might just be saying it so they could look superior to you. The constant oppression and bullying Lagosians encounter everyday has a psychological effect. Many of us here need shrinks more than we know. It is said "Many are mad but few are roaming". Pathological liars are being born everyday owing to the need to "cover up" 'package" and other terms I cant even think of right now.
Our society today has made it almost impossible to stay real and true to oneself and "friends". Everyone is so full of lies and deceit these days. Everybody wants to belong. no one wants to be a "social outcast" but the real question here is - to what end? Even the Bible says' "What shall it profit a man to gain the world and lose his own soul". Everyone is selling out and the real people are getting extinct. If you don't fit into a certain stereotype you are suddenly pushed aside. You see people you call your friends pushing you aside in their quest for social status. They will say you are "stopping their shine". They wanna roll with the big boys and girls now. Ever girl wants to date a guy that has a car, that buys you brazillian hair, pops in the club. and the guys who cant afford to do that are going to crazy lengths to become like that. What with the new hype of them "wire wire" "Malay' boys and many more. Oppression is the constant order of the day. We put ourselves in bondage, shackled by our own insecurity some may call materialism and deceive ourselves that we are living the life. The life of "live fast and die young". Convincing ourselves that somehow these trinkets we gather and the image and the packaging will make us accepted somehow. WOAH! That's pretty sad. Tell me what is the difference between now and when we were being oppressed by the British!!
Beneath all these glitz and glam is a little voice on the inside saying "hope they like me". We shouldn't live to impress humans like ourselves! Please there is a need to change. I call myself a non-conformist because i'd rather have you hate me for exactly what i am than to like me for what i'm totally not! Why must you fix brazillian hair? Why must you do lace wig? (some even use their synthetic hair to make it). Why must you lie that you are in the club popping rosay when you are drinking palm-wine at the nearest "sepe" joint. If you are not doing these things who will come and hold you? I am not saying these things are bad and that if you have the resources to do them, you cant. But don't become a wanna-be without realizing it. Be the way you are and be proud of it. Tell yourself you are the best. Set goals for yourself and work towards it. Never ever say "I am not good enough" or 'I cant do it'. For parents reading this post work on your growing kids. build up their self esteem now! it is the best time too. If the parents of most of us have tried to help while we were growing up, maybe the world around us would be better.
Say no to oppression and modern day slavery. Be bold and stand up for yourself. its human to be insecure. But its also in your hands to decide how these insecurities affect our lives. You can turn these imperfections into perfect imperfections. Once you can do that no one can make you feel inferior. Don't forget that vanity upon vanity all is VANITY.
You know im awesome, xoxo.
Living in Lagos and Nigeria as a whole has thought me the bitterness behind insecurity. I have learnt not to trust anything anyone is saying because they might just be saying it so they could look superior to you. The constant oppression and bullying Lagosians encounter everyday has a psychological effect. Many of us here need shrinks more than we know. It is said "Many are mad but few are roaming". Pathological liars are being born everyday owing to the need to "cover up" 'package" and other terms I cant even think of right now.
Our society today has made it almost impossible to stay real and true to oneself and "friends". Everyone is so full of lies and deceit these days. Everybody wants to belong. no one wants to be a "social outcast" but the real question here is - to what end? Even the Bible says' "What shall it profit a man to gain the world and lose his own soul". Everyone is selling out and the real people are getting extinct. If you don't fit into a certain stereotype you are suddenly pushed aside. You see people you call your friends pushing you aside in their quest for social status. They will say you are "stopping their shine". They wanna roll with the big boys and girls now. Ever girl wants to date a guy that has a car, that buys you brazillian hair, pops in the club. and the guys who cant afford to do that are going to crazy lengths to become like that. What with the new hype of them "wire wire" "Malay' boys and many more. Oppression is the constant order of the day. We put ourselves in bondage, shackled by our own insecurity some may call materialism and deceive ourselves that we are living the life. The life of "live fast and die young". Convincing ourselves that somehow these trinkets we gather and the image and the packaging will make us accepted somehow. WOAH! That's pretty sad. Tell me what is the difference between now and when we were being oppressed by the British!!
Beneath all these glitz and glam is a little voice on the inside saying "hope they like me". We shouldn't live to impress humans like ourselves! Please there is a need to change. I call myself a non-conformist because i'd rather have you hate me for exactly what i am than to like me for what i'm totally not! Why must you fix brazillian hair? Why must you do lace wig? (some even use their synthetic hair to make it). Why must you lie that you are in the club popping rosay when you are drinking palm-wine at the nearest "sepe" joint. If you are not doing these things who will come and hold you? I am not saying these things are bad and that if you have the resources to do them, you cant. But don't become a wanna-be without realizing it. Be the way you are and be proud of it. Tell yourself you are the best. Set goals for yourself and work towards it. Never ever say "I am not good enough" or 'I cant do it'. For parents reading this post work on your growing kids. build up their self esteem now! it is the best time too. If the parents of most of us have tried to help while we were growing up, maybe the world around us would be better.
Say no to oppression and modern day slavery. Be bold and stand up for yourself. its human to be insecure. But its also in your hands to decide how these insecurities affect our lives. You can turn these imperfections into perfect imperfections. Once you can do that no one can make you feel inferior. Don't forget that vanity upon vanity all is VANITY.
You know im awesome, xoxo.
Sunday, July 8, 2012
WANNA-BES
Okay so today I wanna talk about the infamous 'wanna-bes' what makes them tick? What do they hope to gain at the end of a long series of social climbing? And what are they gonna do to get to the top??
We all know that we live in a world of oppression. In our society today, we are faced with pressures day in day out. As ladies its one kind of hair or make-up or designer bags and shoes. As guys and men, its the cars, the cruise, how much you pop in the club excetra excetra. It is left to us to chose whether to maintain our identity and ignore whatever anyone else is doing or to get carried away and want these worldly possessions at all costs! Wanna-bes Wanna-bes Wanna-bes!! Everywhere I go.I'm sick of it really. People should try to understand that the only thing you are best at it being yourself not anyone else! You can't successfully be the second version of someone else.
In my day to day activities I see lots of people giving themselves unnecessary headache just because they want to be the 'happening girl' or the 'big boy'. Carrying material things on their head like its the centre of the world. They can spend all day talking about other people. How big someone's house is how much one yahoo boy hammered and you can practically see the dollar sign glittering in their eyes as they speak! Like 'hello!! They are just people!! They want to be like those people they are so fascinated about for all the wrong reasons. You can't compare yourselves to others if you don't know what they do and can't do what they do. I don't get impressed by anyone easily because I really don't know what they all about. Don't know what they did to get what they have. Don't even believe what people say from their mouth these days. I just know only ME and can vouch for myself.
Being a wanna-be arises from a lot of reasons. It could be the need to be liked at all costs or the idea of being fed up with being 'invisible' for so long. Desperation is the word. Desperation to feel among, desperation to have money and so on. 'Famzing' various 'cool' people who are not even worth the stress. For Christ's sake you can even be better than those people! Everything these days is just packaging! If u put all your time and effort into idolizing someone and you find out they are not even all that what are you going to do? Hang yourself? Oh Silly me! Its on to the next one. That's the pathetic life of the wanna-be. Like a saprophyte eating into the lives of people because you can't survive on your own, because you have lost your identity. That's just the saddest thing!
Please if you happen to fall into this category of people change your ways and work on yourself. Or go for deliverance at the nearest pastor's office :). Can't be so hard for you! *lol* Well that's all for now! Thanks for reading and please drop in your comments. You know I'm awesome.. Xoxo
We all know that we live in a world of oppression. In our society today, we are faced with pressures day in day out. As ladies its one kind of hair or make-up or designer bags and shoes. As guys and men, its the cars, the cruise, how much you pop in the club excetra excetra. It is left to us to chose whether to maintain our identity and ignore whatever anyone else is doing or to get carried away and want these worldly possessions at all costs! Wanna-bes Wanna-bes Wanna-bes!! Everywhere I go.I'm sick of it really. People should try to understand that the only thing you are best at it being yourself not anyone else! You can't successfully be the second version of someone else.
In my day to day activities I see lots of people giving themselves unnecessary headache just because they want to be the 'happening girl' or the 'big boy'. Carrying material things on their head like its the centre of the world. They can spend all day talking about other people. How big someone's house is how much one yahoo boy hammered and you can practically see the dollar sign glittering in their eyes as they speak! Like 'hello!! They are just people!! They want to be like those people they are so fascinated about for all the wrong reasons. You can't compare yourselves to others if you don't know what they do and can't do what they do. I don't get impressed by anyone easily because I really don't know what they all about. Don't know what they did to get what they have. Don't even believe what people say from their mouth these days. I just know only ME and can vouch for myself.
Being a wanna-be arises from a lot of reasons. It could be the need to be liked at all costs or the idea of being fed up with being 'invisible' for so long. Desperation is the word. Desperation to feel among, desperation to have money and so on. 'Famzing' various 'cool' people who are not even worth the stress. For Christ's sake you can even be better than those people! Everything these days is just packaging! If u put all your time and effort into idolizing someone and you find out they are not even all that what are you going to do? Hang yourself? Oh Silly me! Its on to the next one. That's the pathetic life of the wanna-be. Like a saprophyte eating into the lives of people because you can't survive on your own, because you have lost your identity. That's just the saddest thing!
Please if you happen to fall into this category of people change your ways and work on yourself. Or go for deliverance at the nearest pastor's office :). Can't be so hard for you! *lol* Well that's all for now! Thanks for reading and please drop in your comments. You know I'm awesome.. Xoxo
Thursday, May 31, 2012
UNLUCkY IN LOVE
Have you ever wondered, 'why do people get into relationships?'Some to find love, others for social status, others for money, sex and some for marriage and procreation. From what I have gathered, its pretty much confusing. But I do know for sure that everyone start with the hope of finding love! That's one of humans' great desires. No matter how great or powerful or rich and famous, there is always this space that love needs to fill up. That's the basic thing. But somewhere along the way,individuals' priorities change.
Some stop believing in love due to personal experiences or stories heard, others hold on to the hope that love is gonna find them someday but get shattered hopes and dreams in return. Some people prefer to remain guarded for the fear of heartbreak, refusing to open up that soft part of them. I for one has yielded to the latter.
For people called the hopeless romantics and in otherwords, optimists in the world today,they are used as a free ground for a whole lot of arseholes and jerks to thread on. Because they won't stop believing in love and keep yielding themselves to their feelings. This jus gives room for heartbreak and pain as the world we live in today do not appreciate the notion of true love. You can hear the 'I love you too's, 'I'll do anything for you' 'you're my everything' but its all for the show. People would say anything to get what they want and you being so excited about having 'found love', would fall for all the sweet words and in the end, you find out that all you thought was perfect and true and magical comes crashing down in the twinkle of an eye! With just one sentence 'it's over' 'I can't do us anymore' 'I found someone else' the one thing you have put your all into becomes nullified. You even wonder if you missed something! Sad much!
Its even harder these days when you're the kind of so called 'ideal' girl or guy. You know, the kind that everyone wants. The dream guy or girl with beauty, brains, money and good nature. You never knows who wants you for the real thing or just for the hype of having you.. Like a trophy! I definitely have to deal with that everyday of my life now. Infact, I have made up my mind to expect the worst from every guy. Don't even have the 'ginger', the boost, to go into any relationship or abandon an existing one. You know the saying the devil you know is better than the angel you don't know and that the next guy you meet might be worse than the one you already have. I mean I have built up a conviction in my heart that all men will do the same thing. None is different from the other. The sad ugly truth we all have to live with.
Those of you that reason with me and have gone through the same phase understand what I mean. Its now a thing of 'what's the point' 'they will all mess up in the end'. Why should I bother my head pleasing one man or lady when in the end I will only be taken for granted, unappreciated or be hammered with more and more complaints. Its a simple thing people, 'If he can't handle my worst, he aint getting my best'. Only God deserves MY best! Dunno about y'all. I am very justified in this statement because in my short days on this earth I haven't seen any reason I should think otherwise! Its a free world! Drop in your comments, let's hear from your own perspective!
I speak to you as an independent woman 'UNLUCKY IN LOVE'. From the beautiful mind of yours truly. :). You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Some stop believing in love due to personal experiences or stories heard, others hold on to the hope that love is gonna find them someday but get shattered hopes and dreams in return. Some people prefer to remain guarded for the fear of heartbreak, refusing to open up that soft part of them. I for one has yielded to the latter.
For people called the hopeless romantics and in otherwords, optimists in the world today,they are used as a free ground for a whole lot of arseholes and jerks to thread on. Because they won't stop believing in love and keep yielding themselves to their feelings. This jus gives room for heartbreak and pain as the world we live in today do not appreciate the notion of true love. You can hear the 'I love you too's, 'I'll do anything for you' 'you're my everything' but its all for the show. People would say anything to get what they want and you being so excited about having 'found love', would fall for all the sweet words and in the end, you find out that all you thought was perfect and true and magical comes crashing down in the twinkle of an eye! With just one sentence 'it's over' 'I can't do us anymore' 'I found someone else' the one thing you have put your all into becomes nullified. You even wonder if you missed something! Sad much!
Its even harder these days when you're the kind of so called 'ideal' girl or guy. You know, the kind that everyone wants. The dream guy or girl with beauty, brains, money and good nature. You never knows who wants you for the real thing or just for the hype of having you.. Like a trophy! I definitely have to deal with that everyday of my life now. Infact, I have made up my mind to expect the worst from every guy. Don't even have the 'ginger', the boost, to go into any relationship or abandon an existing one. You know the saying the devil you know is better than the angel you don't know and that the next guy you meet might be worse than the one you already have. I mean I have built up a conviction in my heart that all men will do the same thing. None is different from the other. The sad ugly truth we all have to live with.
Those of you that reason with me and have gone through the same phase understand what I mean. Its now a thing of 'what's the point' 'they will all mess up in the end'. Why should I bother my head pleasing one man or lady when in the end I will only be taken for granted, unappreciated or be hammered with more and more complaints. Its a simple thing people, 'If he can't handle my worst, he aint getting my best'. Only God deserves MY best! Dunno about y'all. I am very justified in this statement because in my short days on this earth I haven't seen any reason I should think otherwise! Its a free world! Drop in your comments, let's hear from your own perspective!
I speak to you as an independent woman 'UNLUCKY IN LOVE'. From the beautiful mind of yours truly. :). You know I'm awesome. Xoxo
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
KA-CHING!!
I lie in my bed this morning all I see around me is (dit is 'n) ppointment, riot, anger.. Its a troublesome world we live in. A world where love is dead and everything good is slowly becoming a faint memory. Children are growing up too fast, parents do not have time for their kids anymore. They are too career-oriented and self-obsessed to even care. The signs everywhere remind me that the world as we know it will soon come to an end.
Gone are the days when a man can be taken by his word. In the society we live in today honesty is something that is far gone.everyone is expected to have a alterior motive for everything they engage themselves in. Now,as a young girl you can't be with a man except you want him for his money. You have to have boyfriendss not one because its the order of the day. Those you tell you are faithful to your partner tell you 'shut up' 'we know he can't be the only one' 'who are the others?'. And the young girls who try their best against all odds to be faithful to their partner and vice-versa are frustrated by the infidelity of their better halves. The frustration leads them to question the point of being faithful in the first place. What is the point of giving your all to someone and at the end of the day he or she wakes up to tell you 'I don't love you anymore'. I for one have given up on the little girl dream of pure love and romance. My new motto is to put my all in2 my career and my God those two things wnt rise up to tell you 'I don't love you any more'. I'm an independent woman and will remain so.
People get married today, for better for worse for richer for poorer.. Blah blah blah! Thinking their lives have become a fairytale, a dream come true, only to realize that what used to be a sacred bond is a mere joke in this world we live in. The holiness of matrimony is simply a myth! Pastors now are involved in adultery without blinking an eye! Women cheat on their husbands in d slightest sign of financial crisis. In a gathering of married men, talking of their concubines is more a matter of pride. What happened to one man to one wife! It is a sad story I tell you. I sometimes wonder the use of getting married out of love. That word is a joke to all as far as we all are concerned. This life is full of many unexplainable problems we create for ourselves. I really hope God helps us all!
From the beautiful mind of yours truly, jus thought to share a little piece of it with the world.
You know I'm awesome.. Xoxo
Gone are the days when a man can be taken by his word. In the society we live in today honesty is something that is far gone.everyone is expected to have a alterior motive for everything they engage themselves in. Now,as a young girl you can't be with a man except you want him for his money. You have to have boyfriendss not one because its the order of the day. Those you tell you are faithful to your partner tell you 'shut up' 'we know he can't be the only one' 'who are the others?'. And the young girls who try their best against all odds to be faithful to their partner and vice-versa are frustrated by the infidelity of their better halves. The frustration leads them to question the point of being faithful in the first place. What is the point of giving your all to someone and at the end of the day he or she wakes up to tell you 'I don't love you anymore'. I for one have given up on the little girl dream of pure love and romance. My new motto is to put my all in2 my career and my God those two things wnt rise up to tell you 'I don't love you any more'. I'm an independent woman and will remain so.
People get married today, for better for worse for richer for poorer.. Blah blah blah! Thinking their lives have become a fairytale, a dream come true, only to realize that what used to be a sacred bond is a mere joke in this world we live in. The holiness of matrimony is simply a myth! Pastors now are involved in adultery without blinking an eye! Women cheat on their husbands in d slightest sign of financial crisis. In a gathering of married men, talking of their concubines is more a matter of pride. What happened to one man to one wife! It is a sad story I tell you. I sometimes wonder the use of getting married out of love. That word is a joke to all as far as we all are concerned. This life is full of many unexplainable problems we create for ourselves. I really hope God helps us all!
From the beautiful mind of yours truly, jus thought to share a little piece of it with the world.
You know I'm awesome.. Xoxo
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
LEARN TO BE BY YOURSELF
Today's topic certainly seems interesting. "learn to be by yourself". i picked the statement up from somewhere and it held a lot of meanings. i related it to my surroundings and the world as a whole. the problem with many people today is not being self-sufficient and comfortable in their own skin. most of life's problems is all in the mind, a psychological thing.
Most people allow themselves to be defined by the people they surround themselves with either in relationships or otherwise. people are constantly thinking that they cant be cool until they have this guy or this girl to call their own. we hear prayer points all the time "oh Lord send me my man" "Lord where is my woman" as Tyler Perry said and i quote' " Shut up and wait!". Most people just rush into relationships because of the fear of being alone. But what you don't know is that the time you are using on your own is supposed to be the time you use to work on yourself!! Your personality doesn't have to be linked to anybody's name. make your own name. If you cant be by yourself, how the hell can you cope with two people?! i really want to know.you would be amazed at the crap people put up with just to haave someone to call their own. ".oh, that's my boyfriend" "guess what i'm getting married" but do you know what is happening beneath the smiles and all? if someone doesn't make me happy, i'd rather be alone! it saves me a whole lot of stress. i for one know that the Lord has bigger plans for me in my life than being someone's 'babe'. everyone deserves a chance to be happy. to be themselves.
Most times i look around me and i see people trying to hard to be accepted. for everyone to like them, trying to impress. i think the questions you all should ask your self is.."and what will i gain in the end?".You want people to say "oh, shes so fly, so cool" "wow do you know shes dating lagbaja" "that guy over there has the most beautiful girl as his girlfriend" oh please!! that shouldn't be what life is all about left to me!! these things shouldn't be a criteria on how you live your life. you need to work on yourself! i was having a discussion today with a friend of mine about these relationship issues and we said something. you have to know who you really are before you involve any other person in your life. most people do not even know their worth! like in the story i told in my earlier post. if that young girl had known earlier her self worth, how special she really is (as every individual is), she wont have been pushed around that way. lots of people, in the name of having someone to call their own are being belittled and underestimated. and that is not justice.
We all need to get a grip and not allow any man or woman or guy or girl or lady to define our life due to our insecurities. do not let them get the best of you. lean to be by yourself! it is then and only then you can be truly fulfilled when someone comes your way because you would know who exactly you are and what you want. quit with the trying too hard. never put anyone's convenience over yours especially when you are not sure they would do the same! everyone deserves fair treatment. i for one strongly believe in equality. i cant survive in a relationship that equality doesn't rule. it exhausts both parties and leads to bitterness. both of you should always be ready to go the extra mile for each other.it shouldn't always be one sided. two people should be happy together if not there is no excuse, no point of going into the relationship in the first place.
Two happy people are made up of one happy person plus another happy person as one plus one equals two so to be one happy person, it starts with LEARNING TO BE BY YOURSELF!!
You know im awesome..xoxo
Most people allow themselves to be defined by the people they surround themselves with either in relationships or otherwise. people are constantly thinking that they cant be cool until they have this guy or this girl to call their own. we hear prayer points all the time "oh Lord send me my man" "Lord where is my woman" as Tyler Perry said and i quote' " Shut up and wait!". Most people just rush into relationships because of the fear of being alone. But what you don't know is that the time you are using on your own is supposed to be the time you use to work on yourself!! Your personality doesn't have to be linked to anybody's name. make your own name. If you cant be by yourself, how the hell can you cope with two people?! i really want to know.you would be amazed at the crap people put up with just to haave someone to call their own. ".oh, that's my boyfriend" "guess what i'm getting married" but do you know what is happening beneath the smiles and all? if someone doesn't make me happy, i'd rather be alone! it saves me a whole lot of stress. i for one know that the Lord has bigger plans for me in my life than being someone's 'babe'. everyone deserves a chance to be happy. to be themselves.
Most times i look around me and i see people trying to hard to be accepted. for everyone to like them, trying to impress. i think the questions you all should ask your self is.."and what will i gain in the end?".You want people to say "oh, shes so fly, so cool" "wow do you know shes dating lagbaja" "that guy over there has the most beautiful girl as his girlfriend" oh please!! that shouldn't be what life is all about left to me!! these things shouldn't be a criteria on how you live your life. you need to work on yourself! i was having a discussion today with a friend of mine about these relationship issues and we said something. you have to know who you really are before you involve any other person in your life. most people do not even know their worth! like in the story i told in my earlier post. if that young girl had known earlier her self worth, how special she really is (as every individual is), she wont have been pushed around that way. lots of people, in the name of having someone to call their own are being belittled and underestimated. and that is not justice.
We all need to get a grip and not allow any man or woman or guy or girl or lady to define our life due to our insecurities. do not let them get the best of you. lean to be by yourself! it is then and only then you can be truly fulfilled when someone comes your way because you would know who exactly you are and what you want. quit with the trying too hard. never put anyone's convenience over yours especially when you are not sure they would do the same! everyone deserves fair treatment. i for one strongly believe in equality. i cant survive in a relationship that equality doesn't rule. it exhausts both parties and leads to bitterness. both of you should always be ready to go the extra mile for each other.it shouldn't always be one sided. two people should be happy together if not there is no excuse, no point of going into the relationship in the first place.
Two happy people are made up of one happy person plus another happy person as one plus one equals two so to be one happy person, it starts with LEARNING TO BE BY YOURSELF!!
You know im awesome..xoxo
Sunday, February 26, 2012
ONCE UPON A TIME
Hello World! i want to tell a story..
Once upon a time in the land of Gidi, there lived a beautiful Damsel.She was bright, full of life. She has just moved into the area she anticipated on the new life she and her family were going to have there. it was all a fresh start. new school, new neighbors..then a certain lad caught her eye, she caught his too. they became friends.. then she got infatuated she thought it was love. she couldn't eat, she couldn't sleep. she started to sneak out every night just to spend time with this obsession of hers. they counted stars together, they kissed under the rain. the young girl thought it would all last forever.. she did everything he asked. things she has never tried before. it was exciting. addictive. she didn't ask for anything. she was content to keep doing as he wanted. then her friends took notice. "he's taking advantage of you" they would tell her but her ears were blocked.. only the voice of her lover she listened to. then one fateful day he had her right where he wanted her to be.. in his bed, finally! "Its a sin", 'i'm scared" she pleaded. "don't worry" "everything will be OK" he assured her. "we would be together forever"... He lied. she gave in and a week later she got a break up text. she was broken, she was caught in a bad romance.. he went away with her virtue.
she had no sense of self-worth she didn't even know how so amazing and special she really was. she didn't give up. then she met a tall dark and handsome guy. it was the perfect match. he fascinated her. there was no much melodrama before they became an item. he got the girl easily and he knew how many guys were after her.. he couldn't carry last. he got in. but then he also fell in love it went on and on. he had unfinished business with many other girls but set out to end it all with them, all but one. she found out about that one.. she was broken! but she forgave him. she didn't want to be alone! she wasn't gonna let one person come to destroy her fairy tale! it was too early! and so they moved on. they were like 5and6 then it happened... there was a breach in communication.
he was away and she was lonely, slowly the calls reduced, the texts, she felt she was alone once again.. she was like a single girl. she begged and begged she needed to see her boo to communicate with him but there was no improvement. she offered to go over to his side he refused and gave excuses. then they suddenly argued more than they talked. she started to go out a lot more and met new people. guys always came. some stuck more than the others. then she finally gave in. she began to like someone else they had sex and they started something. the innocent damsel wasn't so innocent anymore. she asked herself what she was doing but she couldn't stop herself. "i have a boyfriend" no one seemed to understand that language. where is "the boyfriend" he was nowhere to be found! she kept flirting around. it didn't matter anyways.. she told herself. "im just having fun" "i would be reunited with my boo very soon" But it never happened. She had drifted! then before she could even know what was happening she found herself caught in the web of three guys. She met the last one at the beach. she kissed him all the way home and thought "oh well! no strings attached" she didn't know she had made a big mistake! he called her the next day and professed love for her! she thought it was silly as she didn't believe in love at first sight. she was mean she was rude she tried everything possible to get him off her neck. she even used the "i have a boyfriend" line. but he didn't relent and she gave in he was about 10years older. with more wisdom and promise. he treated her right and sweet talked her and she was spell bound and thought he just might be the one despite the fact her runaway boyfriend was still there. all her friends advised her to stay with him that he was 'surer'.he was.. till he started asking her best friend out. he also took advantage of her. she let herself get fooled by his sweet words. she was broken she couldn't take it anymore. she has become everyone's whore. she was better than this! all the affairs she had added no value to her life.. she was just used as a trophy or sex toy by everyone. . nobody she was with deserved her. the one who had her was careless with her. the pressure became too much. what happened to the innocent girl who just wanted to be loved? that was all she wanted and needed but she was pushed around like a piece of rag. everyone wanted to call the beautiful damsel their own even if they didn't deserve her. she broke it off with everyone. and found solace by being by herself. she would wait till someone that deserved here came along, someone that would treat her like a queen, that would LOVE her. a friend and a lover all in one, that didnt just want her for her body or as a trophy. she needed a real man that will put her first not a boy or a schemer. she decided to focus on her studies and career. whoever really deserved her would surface.
so everyone, i want you all to tell me what you learnt from this story and discuss, comment.. thanks
PS- the damsel found that guy or rather he found her and they lived happily ever after ;)
you know im awesome... xoxo
Friday, February 17, 2012
CONFESSIONS OF A DISILLUSIONED DAMSEL
Hello world! did you miss me? That was a rhetorical question.. Sure, y'all did! anyways today i want to talk about guys and relationships. Its a common topic that no one seems to get enough of. What with new stories popping up everyday. My keyword today is #why. 'why' 'why' 'why'.
What is wrong with the world. Why is it so hard to find honest people these days. Why do relationships crumble. why does one person start to take the other for granted. it sucks really. the ease by which people use the words 'I love you' and do not mean it. Why you will have someone who really loves you that is all you ever wanted and still be stupid enough to cheat. somethings do not just make a nick of sense.Human nature is so very complex and hence the relationships involved.
Why start what you cannot finish.. Breaking hearts in the process. I feel really disillusioned right now about love and relationships whatsoever. Most of it is about the sex, the idea of being an item and feeling among! The value of communication, respect, friendship is becoming a foreign thing. Slowly going out of existence. its sad but that's the ugly truth. i even doubt whether those things exist anymore and i really fear for the next generation when ours is already this messed up. All i hear around me is F-U-C-K love, 'love is dead' and so on. No one believes in love anymore. As I mentioned in the 'ITS A CRAZY CRAZY WORLD' post everything is just becoming so cliche and boiling down to the same thing.
Girls killing themselves over some guy that's probably telling another girl the things he tells you or sleeping around. is he really worth the trouble? that's what you should ask yourselves. Guys that have fallen head over heels for a girl and she sees someone 'better' and takes the guy for granted and says shes bored. and most of the time, women are usually the ones to mess up in long term relationships because they are easily changeable. Yeah, noted, men are assholes, bastards yeah we all know we say it all the time even i still said it some hours ago. But one thing is for sure when a man loves a woman and has fallen for her he is constant it cant change easily. their problem is just settling down in the first place but once they are in they are in, at least in most cases i have seen. the women are the ones that get easily influenced and are freaked by what they see outside their own relationship and want to have a little taste. and it usually starts by them suddenly trying to turn their man into that their new idea of 'the perfect man' then finding flaws . Then when they see its not working out they go away with someone else that has come to deceive them that he is the one. it never ends well anyways, cuz in the end there is nothing out there. that's why they always say you should stick to the one you have you never know the next person might be worse.(it goes for both sexes though i just mentioned the ladies because its much more rampant with them.) but also a risk, sticking to one person. what if that person is not the right one. and how do you stick without being to attached and careless with your heart?? is it all worth it at the end of the day?
Just thought to share a piece of my mind which is not very stable at the moment. my advice to everyone is not to be too trusting and to expect the worst but hope for the best no matter how good the person appears to be. please send in your comments this topic can be discussed in a million posts and i would still not have said everything.
you know i am awesome
xoxo
Friday, January 20, 2012
THE BEAUTY AND THE CLINICAL COAT: GOSSIP GIRL
THE BEAUTY AND THE CLINICAL COAT: GOSSIP GIRL: so today is my birthday and i haven't had any sleep since yesterday. so much excitement and birthday wishes so just took this opportunity to...
GOSSIP GIRL
so today is my birthday and i haven't had any sleep since yesterday. so much excitement and birthday wishes so just took this opportunity to share my thoughts with y'all once again.
so i was with a group of friends 2days ago (all girls) an i suddenly found myself caught in the middle of serious venomous gossip! we were about 5 girls and all i could hear around me was one beef or the other. the person in question was supposedly 'one of "the girls" some days ago. i just don't understand why girls cant be together without backstabbing! okay about two out of us actually had a direct issue with this person but the others.. why the washing i ask myself! this same girls saying shit about someone cant say it in her front and will be bad mouthing the same people shes badmouthing her with when they are with this girl!! she'll probably even be defending these same people when that happens. its really sad. all in the name of feeling among and having a say in the conversation you just end up talking totally out of line. some people think they have to have a say in what everyone is saying whether it is right or not. i for one despises any form of injustice or hypocrisy. i just don't feel right with being unfair and pretending. what i cant say in your front i wont say behind you and vice versa.. i don't know why girls more than two cant be united anymore. there must be division.
my advise to girls is to be watchful of what you tell your fellow females because most of them don't have your best interests at hand and with a little misunderstanding, they will tell the whole world all your secrets! friends indeed!
you see girls sharing the love! wearing the same thing, walking together, having 'gist' together all na wash! because what is going on in each individual's mind varies widely. the lesser the 'friends' the safer you are i tell ya! jealousy is like poison to a friendship. these days even, when fakeness is the order of the day one has to be extra careful. someone like me i am very liberal and open-minded i have friends of different characters and backgrounds and i am not judgmental and accommodate everyone. but out of all these friends, maybe one or two are my real friends but the people in question here do not even feel it. you might not be close to me at all left to me because maybe i don't trust you and yet you feel like you are my best friend. trust isn't something that should be given so easily. humans are really terrible. at this my young age, i am noticing a lot of things that will later germinate into the things our parents always warn us about concerning friends.. it starts from now this period in life. the people you move with now determine a lot who you are going to end up becoming.
anyways my message to the world today, particularly my fellow females, quit the washing. it is not by force, not a do or die affair. and never let any guy issue come in between your friendships it sucks! that's just a piece of my beautiful mind.. happy birthday to me..
you know i'm awesome
xoxo
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