So I was just tweeting from my official account, @honey_ricci (of course you all are free to follow the page) and i got an inspiration to write on this very pressing issue of insecurity. What triggered this? A simple tweet on my timeline about a girl that was obviously "wearing bum bum" in her avatar. this of course is not a new invention to me, neither is it new to any of the Lagos girl's reading this post and even some of the men! I am not here to talk about the infamous 'bum bum pad" that has raged the hostels of several female students today.That is barely the point! it is just a little node on this big tree called INSECURITY.
Living in Lagos and Nigeria as a whole has thought me the bitterness behind insecurity. I have learnt not to trust anything anyone is saying because they might just be saying it so they could look superior to you. The constant oppression and bullying Lagosians encounter everyday has a psychological effect. Many of us here need shrinks more than we know. It is said "Many are mad but few are roaming". Pathological liars are being born everyday owing to the need to "cover up" 'package" and other terms I cant even think of right now.
Our society today has made it almost impossible to stay real and true to oneself and "friends". Everyone is so full of lies and deceit these days. Everybody wants to belong. no one wants to be a "social outcast" but the real question here is - to what end? Even the Bible says' "What shall it profit a man to gain the world and lose his own soul". Everyone is selling out and the real people are getting extinct. If you don't fit into a certain stereotype you are suddenly pushed aside. You see people you call your friends pushing you aside in their quest for social status. They will say you are "stopping their shine". They wanna roll with the big boys and girls now. Ever girl wants to date a guy that has a car, that buys you brazillian hair, pops in the club. and the guys who cant afford to do that are going to crazy lengths to become like that. What with the new hype of them "wire wire" "Malay' boys and many more. Oppression is the constant order of the day. We put ourselves in bondage, shackled by our own insecurity some may call materialism and deceive ourselves that we are living the life. The life of "live fast and die young". Convincing ourselves that somehow these trinkets we gather and the image and the packaging will make us accepted somehow. WOAH! That's pretty sad. Tell me what is the difference between now and when we were being oppressed by the British!!
Beneath all these glitz and glam is a little voice on the inside saying "hope they like me". We shouldn't live to impress humans like ourselves! Please there is a need to change. I call myself a non-conformist because i'd rather have you hate me for exactly what i am than to like me for what i'm totally not! Why must you fix brazillian hair? Why must you do lace wig? (some even use their synthetic hair to make it). Why must you lie that you are in the club popping rosay when you are drinking palm-wine at the nearest "sepe" joint. If you are not doing these things who will come and hold you? I am not saying these things are bad and that if you have the resources to do them, you cant. But don't become a wanna-be without realizing it. Be the way you are and be proud of it. Tell yourself you are the best. Set goals for yourself and work towards it. Never ever say "I am not good enough" or 'I cant do it'. For parents reading this post work on your growing kids. build up their self esteem now! it is the best time too. If the parents of most of us have tried to help while we were growing up, maybe the world around us would be better.
Say no to oppression and modern day slavery. Be bold and stand up for yourself. its human to be insecure. But its also in your hands to decide how these insecurities affect our lives. You can turn these imperfections into perfect imperfections. Once you can do that no one can make you feel inferior. Don't forget that vanity upon vanity all is VANITY.
You know im awesome, xoxo.
